In many countries, women and men are still not equal in the workplace. Some people think this is unfair, while others believe it is a natural difference.Discuss both views and give your own opinions.

It is widely believed that there

are

Correct subject-verb agreement

show examples

serious

discriminations

Fix the agreement mistake

discrimination

show examples

in the workforce, thereby it is not fair,

while

Linking Words

others argue that it is

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

human’s

Change noun form

human

show examples

nature. From my perspective, I fully endorse that the bias in the

workplace

Use synonyms

are

Change the verb form

show examples

not equal for the vulnerable groups. On the one hand, unfairness in working may lead to less efficiency and

productive

Replace the word

productivity

show examples

, so

discrimination

Use synonyms

ought to be diminished or reduced by certain policies.

For example

Linking Words

, racial, gender and age

discrimination

Use synonyms

will all contribute to

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

poor productivity during work, since workers may be paid with lower income that

Change the verb form

does

show examples

not match their efforts, or demotivated by

less

Change the quantifier

fewer

show examples

promotion opportunities. To deal with

this

Linking Words

problem,

trade

Add an article

the trade

show examples

union

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unions

show examples

should be created to prevent

vulnerable

Correct article usage

a vulnerable

show examples

labor

Change the spelling

labour

show examples

force from being

exploit

Wrong verb form

exploited

show examples

by the firms,

such

Linking Words

as imposing minimum wages for the industries.

As a result

Linking Words

, inequality in the

workplace

Use synonyms

should be reduced

Change preposition

show examples

some extent.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, proponents of the opposite view may highlight the physical and mental

difference

Fix the agreement mistake

differences

show examples

among gender and age.

This

Linking Words

is because males are more physically strong than women or elderly people, so some tough positions like astronaut or electrician are more suitable for men.

However

Linking Words

, women may be more adaptable in jobs like counsellor or nurse which need

emotionally

Change the word

emotional

show examples

intelligence and

patient

Replace the word

patience

show examples

Moreover

Linking Words

, older employees may have more practical experience so jobs like accountant are more

capable

Correct word choice

convenient

show examples

for them.

As a result

Linking Words

discrimination

Use synonyms

is unavoidable

due to

Linking Words

the requirement for different positions

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

varying. In conclusion,

although

Linking Words

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

discrimination

Use synonyms

may occur in some specific fields, the majority of

Use synonyms

workplace

Fix the agreement mistake

workplaces

show examples

should not have discriminatory practices.

Therefore

Linking Words

, I firmly advocate that with the awareness and implementation of reducing unfairness in

Use synonyms

workplace

Add an article

the workplace

show examples

, future society will become more harmonious and prosperous.

chunyanh502

Jul 2, 2025

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task response

Your introduction should clearly state both views before giving your opinion.

coherence and cohesion

Use simpler connecting words to make your ideas flow more smoothly, such as 'Firstly', 'Secondly', and 'In conclusion'.

task response

Provide more specific examples to support your points. You mentioned trade unions, which is good, but additional examples would strengthen your argument.

task response

You presented a balanced view of both sides of the argument, which is important for this type of essay.

coherence and cohesion

Your conclusion clearly states your opinion, which rounds off the essay well.

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11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
23
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

287 words

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In many countries, women and men are still not equal in the workplace. Some people think this is unfair, while others believe it is a natural difference.Discuss both views and give your own opinions.

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.

Some believe success in life comes from hard work, dedication, and motivation. While many believe success depends on other important factors like money and appearance. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

Some people say that advertising is extremely successful at persuading us buy things. Other people think that is so common that we no longer pay attention to it. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion

Many people used distance- learning programs to study at home, but some people think that it cannot bring the benefits as much as attending college or university. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people believe that environmental issues should be the first priority of humanity in the 21st century. To what extent do you agree with the view expressed?