Establishing good relationship in the workplace is not important, as the primary goal of every person is to focus on work. To what extent do you agree with this statement?

There is no denying the fact that, in modern times, many individuals focus on building relationships in the workplace.
While
Linking Words
it is a commonly held belief that the primary goal is to focus on work
instead
Linking Words
of establishing good connections with colleagues, there is an argument that opposes
this
Linking Words
idea. In my opinion, I believe that building good connections with others at work helps employees
to
Verb problem
apply
show examples
exchange their experiences and perform their tasks effectively.
To begin
Linking Words
with, spending around 80 to 90 hours per week at work is very stressful.
In other words
Linking Words
, it gets boring from daily tasks,
such
Linking Words
as sitting in front of computers, diving into operational processes and doing a lot of paperwork.
In addition
Linking Words
, a lack of friendly communication leads employees to burnout and quit their jobs.
For example
Linking Words
, a study conducted in many Japanese companies shows that 88% of workers suffer from overburning and stress
due to
Linking Words
a lack of connection. Another point to consider is that strong relationships between workers help them to exchange experiences in their field and gain knowledge. It is possible to say that challenges often arise in the workplace, and it is not always possible to resolve difficult tasks alone. In these cases, asking colleagues for support is crucial in order to damaging one's professional reputation.
Moreover
Linking Words
, when a person plans to pursue a career in another company, they might ask for a recommendation for a job interview. In conclusion, despite people having different views, I believe that strong interpersonal connections are vital for long-term success.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Make sure to have a clear main idea in each paragraph.
coherence and cohesion
Use linking words to connect your ideas better.
task achievement
Add more specific examples to support your points.
task achievement
The introduction clearly states your opinion on the topic.
coherence and cohesion
The essay has a logical flow and structure.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: