In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Others believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

The graph illustrates that the public
of
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in
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USA
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the USA
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prefer
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prefers
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to eat in fast food
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hotels
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restaurants
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from 2003 to 2013.
Overall
Linking Words
, in the USA, there was
high
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a high
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rise
constant
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in cases
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for once a
week
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and once or twice a month.
On the contrary
Linking Words
, there were people who did not go often or never to
such
Linking Words
hotels
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. In
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year
Correct article usage
the year
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2003, there
was
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were
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around 4% people who visited fast food
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hotels
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restaurants
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every day
and
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, and
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there was
sudden
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a sudden
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sharp rise in
graph
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the graph
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Punctuation problem
, around
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around
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from
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15% to 31% public who went several
times
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a
week
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and once a
week
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respectively
Punctuation problem
, respectively
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.
Then
Linking Words
, there was
steep
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a steep
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fall in those who went
few
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a few
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times
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a
year
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nearly
Punctuation problem
, nearly
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13% and 5% who never went to these
hotels
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. In
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Correct article usage
the year
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year
Fix the agreement mistake
years
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2006 and 2013, there
was
Correct subject-verb agreement
were
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every day
Use the right word
everyday
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people around 3% who went every
.
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day.
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There was skyrocket in several
times
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a
week
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and once a
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week
Check wording
people
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who
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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ate fast food around 20% and 35%. Respectively.
Then
Linking Words
, there was
high
Correct article usage
a high
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decline
nearly
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of nearly
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15% and 4% respectively in a few
times
Use synonyms
a
year
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and those who never visited.

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task achievement
Your introduction needs to clearly state what the graph illustrates and provide a brief overview of the main trends. Also, make sure to summarize the main points in the conclusion.
coherence and cohesion
Try to use clearer structure in your paragraphs. Each paragraph should focus on one main idea to help the reader follow your points better.
task achievement
Ensure that you use accurate data from the graph. Double-check the percentages and phrases used to describe changes, as some seem confusing or incorrect.
task achievement
You've included some relevant data points which supports your discussions about trends in fast food consumption.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • infrastructure
  • efficient
  • congestion
  • sustainable
  • environmentally friendly
  • connectivity
  • economic growth
  • public transportation
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