some people that ari is an essential subject for children where others think is a wate of time. Disscuss both opinon and give your

Some people think that
art
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is an essential subject,
while
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others argue that it is a waste of money and time. In my opinion,
art
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is an important subject in schools as it sparks imagination and creativity, which are crucial for creating fine pieces of
art
Use synonyms
. Thinking outside the box is necessary, and
this
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way of thinking in young minds might lead to innovation.
Moreover
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,
art
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has positive effects on mental health. It helps us connect with our emotions, allowing us to understand and deal with them in healthier ways.
Art
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requires us to connect with ourselves on a deeper level, helping to reduce stress and increase self-esteem and emotional management.
In contrast
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, some believe that
art
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should not be considered a vital subject, as there are more useful fields of study. If children concentrate on those subjects, they might become more successful.
However
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, I strongly believe that
art
Use synonyms
is essential for the future. It teaches the young generation creativity, critical thinking, and aids in mental well-being.

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task achievement
Expand on your ideas with more examples or details to make your points stronger.
coherence and cohesion
Use transitions between paragraphs and ideas to make the essay flow better.
task achievement
Make sure to balance the paragraphs by giving equal attention to both sides of the argument.
content
The introduction clearly presents your opinion on the topic.
content
You mention positive effects of art on mental health, which is a good point.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite
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