IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Write a letter to a friend who has visited you a few days ago and has left his mobile at your place. Please mention: - The visit he paid you and how you felt about it. - How you found his/her cell phone at your place. - Suggest ways of sending it back to him/her.

Dear Neha, I hope
this
Linking Words
 letter finds you well. I'm writing
this
Linking Words
 letter to make you aware
about
Change preposition
of
show examples
 your mobile phone
which
Punctuation problem
, which
show examples
 you forgot at my house during your
last
Linking Words
 visit. Honestly, it was a nice meeting with you
as
Punctuation problem
, as
show examples
 everything went
amazing
Replace the word
amazingly
show examples
 as we planned. I'm missing all our activities
from
Punctuation problem
, from
show examples
 playing sports to eating out.
Last
Linking Words
 evening, when I was cleaning my room where we spent
our all
Correct word order
all our
show examples
 days, suddenly I came across
through
Change preposition
apply
show examples
a mobile phone
,
Punctuation problem
.
show examples
at
Fix capitalization
At
show examples
first
Punctuation problem
first,
show examples
 I didn't
not
Rephrase
apply
show examples
realize
Use the right word
realise
show examples
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
if
Change preposition
apply
show examples
it belongs to you, but when I tried to call you, it started ringing, which helped me to trace it. Since it is your personal property, I don't want
it to hand
Correct word order
to hand it
show examples
 over to anybody
,
Punctuation problem
;
show examples
therefore
Linking Words
, I want
Verb problem
to it
show examples
it to send
Correct word order
send it to
show examples
 you safely
either
Punctuation problem
, either
show examples
 by coming myself or you can come to pick it up at your convenience. Again, I had a great time with you
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
 I look forward to your prompt response. Take Care, Amanjot Kaur

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence and cohesion
Make sure all your ideas flow logically from one to the next. Use more linking words to connect your thoughts better.
task achievement
Try to be clearer when you mention how you found the phone. Also, consider giving specific options for sending it back.
tone
The letter has a warm and friendly tone, which is appropriate for writing to a friend.
task achievement
You addressed all points mentioned in the task prompt, showing a good understanding of what was required.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: