:In some countries, fast food restaurants and companies give money to schools provided that the schools promote their products to school children. What do you think is the positive and negative of this in the development of children?

Junk

Use synonyms

food

Use synonyms

is not

healtyhy

Correct your spelling

healthy

for the

children

Use synonyms

, and there are many kinds of

food

Use synonyms

they can eat

iinstead

Correct your spelling

instead

junk

Use synonyms

food

Use synonyms

. The question is,

Junk

Use synonyms

food

Use synonyms

restaurants provided in the

school

Use synonyms

for

children

Use synonyms

, what are the positive and negative aspects of

this

Linking Words

Change the punctuation

show examples

In my opinion, I do not believe it can help the development of

children

Use synonyms

becasue

Correct your spelling

because

fast

food

Use synonyms

has a negative

impact

Use synonyms

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

children

Use synonyms

. In

this

Linking Words

essay, I am going to introduce the

neagatives

Correct your spelling

negatives

and positives about

junk

Use synonyms

food

Use synonyms

. First of all,

The

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

fast

food

Use synonyms

has many positives.

the

Fix capitalization

The

show examples

children

Use synonyms

school

Use synonyms

should eat healthy

food

Use synonyms

that can help them

Verb problem

apply

show examples

develope

Correct your spelling

develop

them

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

the

Fix capitalization

The

show examples

junk

Use synonyms

food

Use synonyms

is less price than healthy

food

Use synonyms

and available anywhere.

Linking Words

for

Fix capitalization

For

show examples

instance. When I was a child, the

cafereria

Correct your spelling

cafeteria

in my

school

Use synonyms

provide

Wrong verb form

provided

show examples

only fast

food

Use synonyms

and

Punctuation problem

, and

show examples

have

Verb problem

apply

show examples

bought

many

Correct pronoun usage

it many

show examples

times because it was really cheap.

However

Linking Words

There

Fix capitalization

there

show examples

are

Verb problem

is are

show examples

negative

impact

Use synonyms

children

Use synonyms

Punctuation problem

;

show examples

therefore

Linking Words

They

Fix capitalization

they

show examples

have to eat healthy

food

Use synonyms

the

Fix capitalization

The

show examples

junk

Use synonyms

food

Use synonyms

might

impact

Use synonyms

Change preposition

apply

show examples

their healthy mind and they might

Verb problem

apply

show examples

have bad thinking.

for

Fix capitalization

For

show examples

instace

Correct your spelling

instance

there

Fix capitalization

There

show examples

are two schools in my

neighborhood

Use the right word

neighbourhood

show examples

, one of

them

Correct pronoun usage

which

show examples

provide

Correct subject-verb agreement

provides

show examples

junk

Use synonyms

food

Use synonyms

and the other

provide

Correct subject-verb agreement

provides

show examples

healthy

food

Use synonyms

Punctuation problem

;

show examples

however

Linking Words

, the

school

Use synonyms

which

gives

Verb problem

provides

show examples

healthy

food

Use synonyms

has smarter students than the other

school

Use synonyms

. In conclusion, I would argue that

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

healthy

food

Use synonyms

can help

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

student

Fix the agreement mistake

students

show examples

Verb problem

apply

show examples

be smarter.

the

Fix capitalization

The

show examples

junk

Use synonyms

food

Use synonyms

might

impact

Use synonyms

Change preposition

apply

show examples

their mind

Punctuation problem

;

show examples

on the other

Linking Words

hand

Punctuation problem

hand,

show examples

the healthy

food

Use synonyms

might be better for their mind. Kim Yountae

SSaabb23

Jul 6, 2025

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task achievement

Your main points are good, but they need more support. Add examples or details for each point you make.

coherence and cohesion

Make sure your paragraphs are clear. Start each paragraph with a topic sentence that explains what the paragraph will discuss.

coherence and cohesion

Check your spelling and grammar. Some words are misspelled and sentences could be clearer.

task achievement

You clearly state your opinion on the topic, which is important.

coherence and cohesion

You have a good structure with an introduction, body, and conclusion, which helps with understanding.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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5
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
42
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

6 paragraphs

249 words

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:In some countries, fast food restaurants and companies give money to schools provided that the schools promote their products to school children. What do you think is the positive and negative of this in the development of children?

Fully explain your ideas

recycling is now an essential measure: it is time for everyone in society to became more responsible towards the environment. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Some people feel that manufactureres and supermarkets have the responsibility to reduce the amount of packaging of goods. Others argue that customers should avoid buying goods with a lot of packaging. Discuss both view and give your opinion.

Some people think that the development of technology has made our life more complex, and the solution is to live a simpler life without technology. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Small business should avoid recruiting young women who do not have their own family in order to avoid paying maternity leave later on. To what level do you agree or disagree?