IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Weddings are getting bigger and more expensive. What is the reason for this? Is it a negative or positive development?

Without any qualms, it has become very costly to hold marriages as bigger events. The major causes of
this
Linking Words
 trend are
maintenance
Correct article usage
the maintenance
show examples
 of social
status
Use synonyms
 and
expression
Correct article usage
the expression
show examples
 of uniqueness in the wedding by the individuals.
This
Linking Words
 essay believes that it is a positive progress as it is a sole opportunity of social interaction and strengthening of societal bonds
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
this
Linking Words
 ceremony serves as an unforgettable
day
Use synonyms
 which brings everyone together and closer. The primary reason why weddings are becoming lavish and exorbitant is that people aspire to maintain their
status
Use synonyms
 in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society and show
the
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
 wealth to others. To be more precise, spending lots of money to organise
marriage
Correct article usage
a marriage
show examples
 function is the symbol of prosperity in the community.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, luxurious ceremonies represent uniqueness and bring the couple and their family into
limelight
Correct article usage
the limelight
show examples
. Receiving praise from attendees of the events
make
Correct subject-verb agreement
makes
show examples
 them feel contented about
arrangements
Correct article usage
the arrangements
show examples
.
Also
Linking Words
, in recent times, couples try to design and plan their wedding as per their desire
which
Punctuation problem
, which
show examples
 often results in higher expenditure. In my opinion,
this
Linking Words
 practice is a positive development as
wedding
Correct article usage
the wedding
show examples
day
Use synonyms
 is the only
day
Use synonyms
where
Correct word choice
when
show examples
 one can interact with all the relatives and acquaintances in a company. Strengthening of social bonds is ensured as all the known people are invited to the functions.
Huge
Correct article usage
A huge
show examples
 amount of money is spent in order to honour everyone and represent a
reputed
Correct word choice
reputable
show examples
status
Use synonyms
 in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society.
Moreover
Linking Words
,
sense
Correct article usage
a sense
show examples
 of community and togetherness is expressed as
such
Linking Words
 events bring everyone together to celebrate the happy time with the family
which
Punctuation problem
, which
show examples
 makes it an unforgettable
day
Use synonyms
. Matrimonial ceremonies are very special
Linking Words
due
Punctuation problem
, due
show examples
 to which
family
Correct article usage
the family
show examples
expenses
Verb problem
spends
show examples
 money as
reflection
Correct article usage
a reflection
show examples
 of how precious
is
Correct word order
this day is
show examples
this
Linking Words
day
Use synonyms
 to them. In conclusion, maintaining societal
status
Use synonyms
 and expressing
unique
Correct article usage
a unique
show examples
 identity at the causes of
this
Linking Words
 tendency. I believe that it is a positive development as it enhances the interaction and
strengthen
Correct subject-verb agreement
strengthens
show examples
 bonds among people and
instills
Use the right word
instils
show examples
sense
Correct article usage
a sense
show examples
 of community and togetherness.

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task achievement
Try to make your main points clearer and more detailed. Use specific examples to support your ideas more.
coherence and cohesion
Make sure your paragraphs flow better. Use linking words to connect your ideas and make them easier to follow.
coherence and cohesion
Add more detail in your introduction and conclusion. They should better sum up your main ideas.
task achievement
You have identified important reasons for the trend of expensive weddings.
task achievement
Your opinion is clear: you see the trend as a positive development.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • lavish
  • extravagant
  • nuptials
  • matrimony
  • social status
  • opulence
  • milestone
  • financial leverage
  • debt
  • peer pressure
  • consumerism
  • showcase event
  • ceremonial splendor
  • bridal extravaganza
  • market forces
  • commercialization
  • budgeting
  • social comparison
  • destinal wedding
  • event planning
  • wedding vendors
  • loan
  • prestige
  • economic impact
  • mandatory spending
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