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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The map below shows a school in 1985 and the school now. Summarize the information by selectiong and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant. (MINH BUI)

The map below shows a school in 1985 and the school now. Summarize the information by selectiong and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant. (MINH BUI)
The map displays the changes that
happend
Correct your spelling
happened
 to a school during the period of time from 1985 and now.
Overall
Linking Words
, the school
had
Wrong verb form
has
show examples
 gone through major changes since 1985 by adding more amenities to its
buliding
Correct your spelling
building
. One of the most
noticable vraition
Correct your spelling
noticeable variations
 is removing the car park to the north of the
classrooms
Use synonyms
 in the 1985
buliding
Correct your spelling
building
.
As well as
Linking Words
 replacing the library with
new
Correct article usage
a new
show examples
 learning resources
center
Use the right word
centre
show examples
, computer room and
classrooms
Use synonyms
. The size of the playing
feilds
Correct your spelling
fields
 was reduced and
new
Correct article usage
a new
show examples
 pool and fitness
center
Use the right word
centre
show examples
 were built to the west of the
feild
Correct your spelling
field
. The road in the middle of the
bullding
Correct your spelling
building
 was removed and replaced by some trees,
while
Linking Words
 to the east of the
school
Add a comma
school,
show examples
 the
classrooms
Use synonyms
buliding
Correct your spelling
building
 stayed
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
 the same place and a new floor was added to it.
Linking Words
Also
Add a comma
Also,
show examples
 another
classrooms
Use synonyms
 were added to the north of the playing
feild
Correct your spelling
field
 after its reduction.

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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Replace the words classrooms with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "changes" was used 2 times.
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