These days people prefer to watch live performances on TV or computer, online rather than go to the place of that event. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Nowadays, individuals prefer to show the live performance on their devices ,

instead

Linking Words

of watching it live. I totally agree,

due to

Linking Words

the high cost demand for watching it live, and

also

Linking Words

because it is more flexible and comfortable

while

Linking Words

viewing it on your TV. The high cost of demand for live shows is the reason for the preference to stay at home and watch . Most of the viewers

for

Change preposition

show examples

these entertainment shows are teenagers ,since they do not have responsibilities. So these ages basically do not have their own resources for making money

Punctuation problem

, or

show examples

they

consider

Wrong verb form

are considered

show examples

Change preposition

apply

show examples

restricted resources

Punctuation problem

;

show examples

consequently

Linking Words

staying

Punctuation problem

, staying

show examples

at home and watching it online is more affordable for them.

For instance

Linking Words

, the number of audiences and attendance in theatres or cinemas was widely decreased Online watching is much more flexible than attending it live. Live shows involve being free for two to three hours , as the movie starts, you will not be able to stop it , skip or even go back to some scenes.

While

Linking Words

watching it online is more convenient because it allows you to watch at any time you are free,

furthermore

Linking Words

, you are able to lower the

voice

Use the right word

volume

show examples

or separate it into parts

Punctuation problem

, as

show examples

you will not be free and have nothing to do all the time.

For example

Linking Words

, Netflix subscriptions have increased since it provides a comfortable experience that allows you to watch at any time you want. In conclusion, people prefer online watches because of the convenient experience the entertainment initiatives provide ,and

also

Linking Words

the high prices demanded for watching your favourite performance live.

narjesalshasr143

Jul 13, 2025

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coherence and cohesion

Make sure each paragraph focuses on one main idea. This can help the reader understand your points better.

task achievement

Use clearer examples to support your ideas, as this makes your argument stronger. For instance, you could add more details about why costs are high.

coherence and cohesion

Try to fix some grammar and sentence structure. This will help make your writing easier to read.

task achievement

You present a clear opinion on the topic, which is important for the task.

coherence and cohesion

You have included a conclusion that summarizes your thoughts, which gives structure to your essay.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

266 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

live performances
TV
computer
online
event
agree
disagree
convenience
accessibility
cost-effectiveness
variety
options
comfort
interaction
engagement
social experience

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These days people prefer to watch live performances on TV or computer, online rather than go to the place of that event. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

Some educationists think that international exchange visits will benefit the teenagers at the school. To what extent do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages.

You have seen a advertisement in an australian magazine for someone to live with a family for six months and after look after their six year old child. Write a eletterto the parents. In your letter Explain why you would like the Job

The internet has greatly increased our access to information. To what extent do you think this is a good thing? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your knowledge or experience

Million of dollars are spent on space research every year. Some people argue that the money should be spent on improving living standards on Earth. Do you agree or disagree?

In some cultures elderly people are highly valued, while in some other cultures youth are more valued. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.