IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Last Friday you flew from New York to Paris. When you arrived home, you discovered that you had left your cabin bag on the plate. Write a letter to the airline. In your letter: •Where and when you lost your bag •What your bag looks like •What its content were

Dear Sir or Madam, My name is Ashunkumar Patel
,
Punctuation problem
.
show examples
 I am writing
this
Linking Words
 letter to raise a concern regarding my cabin
bag
Use synonyms
which
Punctuation problem
, which
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 I forgot to collect from the security check-in at booth four.
As
Change preposition
Last
show examples
last
Linking Words
Friday
Punctuation problem
Friday,
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 I took flight(JFK256) from New York to Paris
and
Punctuation problem
, and
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 as soon as
arrived
Correct pronoun usage
I arrived
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at
Change preposition
apply
show examples
home
Punctuation problem
home,
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 I recognised that one
bag
Use synonyms
is
Wrong verb form
was
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 left behind. I believe that my wait period after security check-in was
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
one hour, so approximately 7:30 PM I put my
bag
Use synonyms
 on
plate
Correct article usage
the plate
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. As
inspection
Correct article usage
the inspection
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gets
Verb problem
was
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 completed,
meanwhile
Rephrase
apply
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I had an important phone call, and
due to
Linking Words
Correct article usage
the hussle
show examples
Correct your spelling
hustle
hussle
Punctuation problem
hussle,
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 I forgot to collect that
bag
Use synonyms
. The
bag
Use synonyms
 is in blue colored hard plastic case from American Tourister. The size of
Use synonyms
bag
Correct article usage
the bag
show examples
 is
same
Correct article usage
the same
show examples
 as the cabin requirement,
while
Linking Words
 there is
tag
Correct article usage
a tag
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of
Change preposition
with
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 my name
refering
Correct your spelling
referring
the
Change preposition
to the
show examples
 address of my
destination
Punctuation problem
destination,
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that is
Linking Words
,
of
Change preposition
apply
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Paris. In that
bag
Use synonyms
, there
are
Verb problem
is are
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 set of clothes, a pair of shoes, and some important travelling documents.
Apart from
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
, it contains my gadget accessories like cables, adapters and
few
Correct article usage
a few
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 cash of $250, in the bills of $50. Kindly, I would like to request
you that
Correct word order
that you
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 look into
this
Linking Words
 matter
in
Change preposition
on
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priority
Correct article usage
a priority
show examples
 basis, and let me know
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the procedures how it will be returned. Yours
Sincerly
Correct your spelling
sincerely
, Ashun Patel

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task achievement
Make sure to clearly state what you want from the airline at the end of your letter to improve task response.
coherence and cohesion
Try to use more linking words to connect your ideas and improve the flow of your writing.
coherence and cohesion
Be careful with spelling and grammar, like 'hussle' should be 'hustle' and other minor mistakes, to make your writing clearer.
task achievement
You provided detailed information about where and when you lost the bag, which is very good for the task.
task achievement
Your description of the bag and its contents is clear and helps the reader understand better.

The Closing

The style of the letter determine how you have to close it.

Check out the suggested closing sentences for each type of letter in the General IELTS Test. The closing sentence should be the last sentence of your letter.

Formal style (To someone you have not met, whose name you don’t know)

  • Yours faithfully,

Semi-formal (To someone you may or may not have met, whose last name you know)

  • Yours sincerely,

Informal (To someone you know well, whose first name you know and use)

  • Best regards,
  • Warm wishes,

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