Many people say that the only way to grarantee getting a good job is to complete a course of university education.Others claim that it is better to start work after school and gain experience

Many
people
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opined that the only way to
grarantee
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guarantee
getting a good job is to complete a course of
university
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education.
While
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others claim that it is better to start work after school and gain experience.Discuss both views and give your opinions
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One
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On
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the
one
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hand,there are some crucial reasons why some
group
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groups
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of
people
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succeed in life after attending
university
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.The
intial
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initial
matter to be mentioned is capability
which
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, which
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can bring about
profession
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a profession
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Punctuation problem
. this
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this
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This
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is
due to
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the fact that,
as a consequence
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,it is possible that employees choose them.
Besides
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,having
academic
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an academic
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qualification can lead to
be
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being
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promoted to
higher
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a higher
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position
which
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, which
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is vital in a
person
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person's
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career
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.To achieve great
sucess
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success
in
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career
Correct article usage
a career
show examples
,each person should practice working
skill
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skills
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, communication
skill
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skills
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and
experience
Verb problem
gain experience
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available
Correct word choice
.
show examples
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One
Use the right word
On
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the other hand, despite the advantages of completing
university
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,some argued that some famous
business men
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businessmen
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who never went to
university
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still achieve significant goals based on various
experience
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experiences
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.Many
people
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for that going to
university
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or completing
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this
Correct determiner usage
an
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academic job may not become the only way to have a significant
career
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.
For example
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,Steve
job
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Jobs
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who
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, who
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had not finished his course in
college
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college,
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improved innovative technology
particularly
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, particularly
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in
Change preposition
at
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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Apple.
In addition
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,his creation can meet
people
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's needs to
designed
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design
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high-technological pieces like
I pad
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iPad
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,
I phone
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iPhone
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and other…Aside from
degree
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the degree
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isn't the best method, have a sustainable need to rely on creation
,
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.
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intelligent and many other important
skill
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skills
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In short, to have a stable
career
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after graduation doesn't
only depend
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depend only
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on qualification but
also
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on
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one
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one's
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own abilities and strengths

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coherence
Make sure your introduction clearly outlines the two views.
coherence
Use clearer topic sentences to show the main ideas in each paragraph.
cohesion
Add a more defined conclusion summarizing your opinion.
task achievement
Check for grammar and spelling errors to improve overall clarity.
task achievement
You provided relevant examples like Steve Jobs for your argument.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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