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Writing Samples
Band 5

Some people would say that parents should pay their children for small home duties (cleaning, washing dishes). Other would disagree. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Youth is the future of the nation
as well as
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 of their
parents
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;
as a result
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, they should be involved in some
household
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 chores and should be paid for that ,
such
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 as for cleaning and doing the dishes,
according
Add the preposition
according to
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the
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apply
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some array of masses;
nevertheless
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, others oppose
this
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 notion. Both ideas will be discussed in the forthcoming paragraphs ,
along with
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 the conclusion
at the end
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. The foremost reason behind paying teenagers for the basic home responsibilities is their self-dependability. When they get paid for the small
household
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tasks
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, they will have an opportunity to save their
money
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 for their education or higher studies. To cite an example, if a child gets 500
dollars
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apply
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per month from his
parents
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, he has a golden opportunity to save 6000 dollars, which
further
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 can be spent on higher education.
Therefore
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, it is a good idea to pay the youngsters for the small homely
tasks
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 for the betterment of their future.
Nonetheless
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, it is not always a good practice to provide the youth
money
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 for the fundamental
household
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tasks
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 because they do not know
that
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apply
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what is good for them and what is bad. Sometimes,
this
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 sort of activity may provoke them to indulge in criminal or drug-related habits
due to
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 the possession of sufficient funds. For instance, a child with $500 can have a notion to spend
money
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 on drugs, which may
further
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 lead him to be an illicit person;
as a result
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, he becomes a black sheep in society.
Hence
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, it is certainly not appropriate to provide a child
money
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 for small
tasks
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 at home. In conclusion,
although
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 the
money
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 plays a crucial role in mending the future of youngsters when it is given by
parents
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 in
completion
Correct article usage
the completion
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 of small
household
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 activities, yet the significance of not paying them cannot be neglected.
Thus
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, the
parents
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 should always consider twice before making any decision
while
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 aware
of
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apply
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that
this
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 sort of step can spoil or mend their children's lives.

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task achievement
Make sure to clearly state your opinion in the introduction and conclusion. This helps the reader know your stance on the topic.
coherence and cohesion
Use clear paragraphs for each main idea. It helps in making the essay easier to follow.
task achievement
Try to support your points with clearer examples. This can make your arguments more convincing.
task achievement
You have discussed both views on the topic, showing good understanding.
coherence and cohesion
Your introductory sentence is clear and sets up the essay well.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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