IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

You live in a room in college which you share with another student. However, there are many problems with this arrangement and you find it very difficult to work. Write a letter to the accommodation officer at the college. In the letter:  describe the situation  explain your problems and why it is difficult to work  say what kind of accommodation you would prefer

Dear Ms. Moeyaert, I am writing to let you know about my current living
situation
Use synonyms
 with my roommate.
In
Change preposition
At
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 the
starting
Replace the word
start
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 of the
summer
Add a comma
summer,
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 my previous roommate left after completing her graduation, and
the
Correct article usage
a
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 new student came to share the
room
Use synonyms
 with me. Recently, I
am
Wrong verb form
have been
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 having
hard
Correct article usage
a hard
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 time sharing
accomodation
Correct your spelling
accommodation
 with her. Let me explain my
situation
Use synonyms
. She is a
first year
Use the right word
first-year
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 college student and likes to party a lot. Every other day, she
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
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 her boyfriend over in the shared
room
Use synonyms
, and
this
Linking Words
 makes me uncomfortable. If
this
Linking Words
 is once in a
Linking Words
while
Use the right word
once-in-a-while
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situation
Use synonyms
,
then
Linking Words
 it would be understandable; but most of the time they hang out in the
room
Use synonyms
, and play incessantly loud music.
Furthermore
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 makes the
situation
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 even worse because I am in my
last
Linking Words
 year of graduation, and I have to do
lot
Correct article usage
a lot
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 of assignments
but
Punctuation problem
, but
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 in
this
Linking Words
 kind of environment, I am unable to concentrate. Would you kindly allot me a different
room
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,
Punctuation problem
apply
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 so that I can focus on my studies
.
Change the punctuation
?
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 I don't have any issue specifications or conditions
,
Punctuation problem
;
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 it's just that the place needs to be quiet and tidy. Please get back to me as soon as possible because my exams are starting next month, and I really need to study to get good grades. Thank you for your time and consideration. Yours sincerely, Simranpreet Kaur

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coherence
Try to use clearer paragraphs to separate ideas. Start with a short introduction, then describe the problems, and finish with your request.
task achievement
Your letter has a clear message and goes directly to the point about your problem.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • accommodation officer
  • roommate
  • share a room
  • living arrangement
  • difficult to work
  • noise levels
  • study environment
  • privacy concerns
  • alternative accommodation
  • single room
  • academic performance
  • well-being
  • respectfully request
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