IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

"Nowadays, many students are highly motivated to gain knowledge for their future careers. To what extent do you agree that motivation or strong foundational knowledge plays a more important role in academic and professional success?"

Nowadays, many
students
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 strongly gain
knowledge
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 for future work . In my opinion,
this
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 issue can be solved with proper education and independent effortsThere is a
motivation
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 to study that can stem from both internal and external factors. Internally, a genuine interest in the subject matter, a desire to master a skill, or a belief in personal growth can be powerful drivers. Externally, goals like achieving good grades, securing a desired job, or pleasing family members can
also
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 be motivating forces. A desire to outperform others can be a motivating factor for some individuals. The desire to avoid negative consequences,
such
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 as poor grades or disappointing others, can
also
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 be a motivator. When
students
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 are genuinely interested in what they are learning, they are more likely to be motivated to study.A focus on improving one's understanding and skills, rather than just achieving a specific grade, can lead to deeper engagement and
motivation
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.Another important solution is a
students
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 should prioritise focusing on
knowledge
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 acquisition rather than solely relying on motivational lessons.
While
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motivation
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 plays a role in learning, a strong foundation in
knowledge
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 is essential for long-term academic success and the ability to apply that
knowledge
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 effectively.
Knowledge
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 allows
students
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 to apply what they learn in real-world situations and solve problems.In conclusion,
while
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motivation
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 is important for initiating the learning process, it is the
knowledge
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 gained that truly empowers
students
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 to succeed academically and professionally.

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coherence and cohesion
Make sure each paragraph has a clear main idea, and develop it with examples.
task achievement
Make your introduction clearer by stating your opinion more directly.
task achievement
Add specific examples to support your points about motivation and knowledge.
task achievement
You show an understanding of the importance of both motivation and knowledge.
coherence and cohesion
Your conclusion summarizes your view clearly.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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