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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The pie chart below show the average household expenditures in Japan and Malaysia in the year 2010.

The pie chart below show the average household expenditures in Japan and Malaysia in the year 2010.
The pie charts illustrate the average household expenditures in
Japan
Use synonyms
 and
Malaysia
Use synonyms
 in 2010, divided into five categories
:
Punctuation problem
:
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 housing, food, transport, health care, and other goods and services.
Overall
Linking Words
, housing accounted for the largest portion of spending in
Malaysia
Use synonyms
,
while
Linking Words
 Japanese households spent the most on other goods and services. Health care represented the smallest expenditure in both countries. In
Malaysia
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, 34% of household spending went to housing, compared to 21% in
Japan
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. Food was the second-largest category in both countries, comprising 27% in
Malaysia
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 and 24% in
Japan
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. The most significant portion of Japanese spending was on other goods and services, at 29%, which was substantially higher than
Malaysia
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’s 3%. Transport accounted for 20% of spending in
Japan
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, double that of
Malaysia
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 (10%).
Finally
Linking Words
, both countries spent the least on health care, with
Japan
Use synonyms
 at 6% and
Malaysia
Use synonyms
 at 3%.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Basic structure: Change the fifth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words japan, malaysia with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fifth paragraph.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • household expenditures
  • proportion
  • cultural differences
  • economic differences
  • living standards
  • real estate market
  • public transportation
  • private transportation
  • infrastructure
  • government healthcare policies
  • quality of life
  • holistic view
  • inflation
  • economic growth
  • societal norms
  • globalization
  • communication expenses
  • education expenses
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