IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

Question-fossil fuel ,such as coal, oil and natural gas, are the main source for many countries however some nations are using alternative energy such as solar power and wind power. do you think this is a positive or negative development?

In many parts of the world, fossil
fuels
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 remain the primary source of
energy
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, powering industries, transportation, and households.
However
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, a growing number of countries are shifting towards renewable
energy
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 sources
such
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 as solar and
wind
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 power.
This
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 essay will argue that
this
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 transition is a highly positive development, as it helps combat environmental challenges and promotes long-term
energy
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 sustainability. One major advantage of using renewable
energy
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 is the significant reduction in environmental pollution. Fossil fuel combustion releases large amounts of carbon dioxide and other harmful gases, contributing to global warming and air pollution.
In contrast
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, solar and
wind
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 power generate clean
energy
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 without emitting greenhouse gases.
For instance
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,
according to
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 the International
Energy
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 Agency, countries that have heavily invested in
wind
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energy
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,
such
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 as Denmark, have seen notable improvements in air quality and a substantial decrease in carbon emissions.
This
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 shift directly supports efforts to combat climate change and protect the environment for future generations. Another important benefit of adopting alternative
energy
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 is its potential to ensure long-term
energy
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 security. Fossil
fuels
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 are finite resources
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
 their prices are often unstable
due to
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 geopolitical tensions. Renewable
energy
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,
on the other hand
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, is naturally replenished and widely available. Countries that harness solar and
wind
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 power can reduce their dependence on imported
fuels
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 and create more resilient
energy
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 systems.
For example
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, Germany’s Energiewende policy has allowed the country to produce over 40% of its electricity from renewables, reducing reliance on coal and gas
while
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 boosting technological innovation and job creation in the green sector. In conclusion, the move from fossil
fuels
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 to alternative
energy
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 sources is a positive development. It not only helps address urgent environmental issues but
also
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 promotes
energy
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 independence and sustainability. As the global demand for
energy
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 continues to grow, investing in renewable resources is both a wise and necessary step forward.

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task achievement
The essay clearly addresses the question with a clear argument in favor of renewable energy.
coherence and cohesion
Each paragraph has a clear main idea and supports it well, which helps the reader follow the argument easily.
task achievement
More specific examples from other countries could strengthen the argument further.
coherence and cohesion
The introduction outlines the main points effectively, setting up a strong argument for transition to renewable energy.
coherence and cohesion
The conclusion summarizes the essay nicely, reinforcing the positive aspects of using alternative energy.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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