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Writing Samples
Band 5

Some experts believe that it is better for children to begin learning a foreign language at primary school rather than a secondary school. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

Some analytics argue that it
favourable
Verb problem
is favourable
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 for younger students to start learning a second
language
Use synonyms
 in primary school rather than high school.
This
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 essay will discuss the advantages and the drawbacks of
this
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 topic within the frameworks of productivity and efficiency . One major advantage is that it will develop their
brain
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 and increase their IQ, which will happen under specific circumstances. If you put your
brain
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 under strong pressure, like talking two languages relatively,
then
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 it will improve your
brain
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 to tolerate harsh conditions ,
together with
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 your IQ .
For example
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 , studies show that kids in Europe get a high degree in IQ test, because of their
a
Correct article usage
apply
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mixed community that contains a variety of ethnics ,
as a result
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, that mixed community will innately teach them a different
language
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 when they are at
such
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 a young age .
On the other hand
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 , there is a major disadvantage , which is that it will cause a problem in their native
language
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, like forgetting how to speak it fluently. It happened
due to
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 the required time to learn a second
tongue
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 perfectly , which will affect the native
tongue
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, since every
language
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 needs a huge amount of time to speak it fluently.
For instance
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, the citizens of northern Russia have started to lose their identities, because of the Russian
tongue
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 since it
ha
Use the right word
has
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 become a hegemonic
language
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 which causes other tongues to disappear. In conclusion, we can see that learning a second
language
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 may have advantages or disadvantages depending on the way they are learn it
.
Verb problem
is learned.
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While
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 it can develop their
brain
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 and increase their ability
in thinking
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to think
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, it can cause problems like forgetting their native
tongue
Use synonyms
 and the roots of their native languages.

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coherence
Ensure that each paragraph clearly supports the main points of your argument and is well-organized.
task achievement
Make sure to develop your ideas more fully and connect them clearly to your arguments.
content
The essay presents a balanced view with both advantages and disadvantages.
content
You provided some examples to support your points, which is a good practice.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • cognitive abilities
  • pronunciation
  • self-conscious
  • cultural awareness
  • global society
  • proficiency levels
  • competitive job market
  • foundational skills
  • qualified teachers
  • recreational activities
What to do next:
Look at other essays: