Some people say that parents have the most important role in a child's development. However, others argue that other things like television or friends have the most siginificant influence. Discuss both views and opinion.

The country's economy depends on the future generation. Few individuals believe that guardians play a crucial role in a
child
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's
development
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. Whilst
,
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apply
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television
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or
friends
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are
also
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highlighted in the growth of
Use synonyms
child
Correct article usage
a child
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.In my opinion, a combination of the two is the best way forward. On the one hand, good parenting teaches a number of things to juveniles which are essential for their
development
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.
For example
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, healthy eating and regular doctor check-ups are required for every
child
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's growth in order to protect them from maladies and viruses.
Thus
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, that responsibility belongs to parents only.
However
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, schools are
also
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taking
initiative
Correct article usage
the initiative
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of organising
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to organise
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medical check-ups for all-age students
,
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;
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as a result
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, most students tend to get free treatments, which is helpful for those
,
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apply
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who belong to middle-class families.
Furthermore
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,it could be argued that these medical camps at educational centres are not worth that much because they happen once or twice a year.
Television
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and
friends
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are the ones that stay in children's lives for a lifetime.
For instance
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, watching
cartons
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cartoons
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improves imagination power and enhances creativity among kids.
Moreover
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, utilising spare time with
friends
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in a playground ameliorates physical strength , which leads to growth in the
overall
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body.
Thus
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, both
television
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and
friends
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are a mixture of mental and physical
development
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.
To conclude
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,
although
Linking Words
,
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apply
show examples
parents' involvement should be considered important for a
child
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'
development
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,I believe that
television
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and
friends
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are
also
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required for both mental and physical
development
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.

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coherence and cohesion
Make sure each paragraph clearly supports your main argument. Use topic sentences to connect ideas.
task achievement
Expand on your examples with more details to strengthen your points.
coherence and cohesion
Fix grammar errors and improve sentence structure. Pay attention to punctuation for better readability.
task achievement
You present a reasonable opinion showing balance between parents and other influences.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • role models
  • values
  • norms
  • emotional support
  • psychological growth
  • educational tool
  • cognitive development
  • social influencers
  • social skills
  • balanced influence
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