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Writing Samples
Band 7

Nowadays many people have access to computers and a large number of children enjoy playing video games What ar ethe advantages and disadvantages of playing video games for children?

These days, computers and other electronic devices are widely accessible, and playing
video
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games
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 has become a common activity among
children
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.
While
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video
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games
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 can offer certain benefits, they
also
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 pose several risks.
This
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 essay will examine both the advantages and disadvantages of
this
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 growing trend. One of the main advantages of playing computer
video
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games
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 is that they can help improve
children
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’s cognitive abilities. Many
games
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 involve problem solving, memory, and enhance mental development.
For example
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, puzzle
games
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 or strategy-based
games
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 can sharpen a child’s critical thinking and decision-making skills.
Additionally
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, educational
games
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 are increasingly being used as tools in classrooms to make learning more engaging and interactive.
On the other hand
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,
video
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games
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also
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 have several disadvantages that should not be overlooked. One major concern is the risk of addiction. Many
children
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 spend hours playing
games
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, which can interfere with their studies, reduce the time spent on physical activities, and negatively affect their
overall
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 development.
In addition
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, excessive screen time can lead to health issues
such
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 as eye strain, headaches, and even obesity
due to
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 a lack of exercise. Another serious drawback can be seen is the exposure to violent or inappropriate content in some
games
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, which may influence a child’s behaviour and emotional well-being. Without proper supervision,
children
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 might
also
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 be vulnerable to online threats,
such
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 as cyberbullying or interaction with strangers in multiplayer platforms. In conclusion,
although
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video
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games
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 can be educational and entertaining for
children
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, they can
also
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 create serious problems when overused or played without supervision.
Therefore
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, it is important for parents and educators to guide
children
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 in using
video
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games
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 responsibly and encourage a healthy balance between screen time and other activities.

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task achievement
Try to give more examples to support your main points. This will make your ideas stronger and clearer.
coherence and cohesion
Make sure your ideas flow smoothly from one to the next. Using clear connectors can help with this.
task achievement
Your introduction clearly states the topic and the main ideas of the essay.
coherence and cohesion
The essay has a clear conclusion that summarizes your points and offers a good statement about the importance of balance.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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