IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Differences between countries become less evident each year. Nowadays, all over the world, people share the same fashions, advertising, brands, eating habits and TV channels. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages of this?

There is no denying the fact that many nations' trust has decreased over the years.
While
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 it is a commonly held belief that the majority of inhabitants are launched together lots of things
such
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 as the goods, products and etc, there is
also
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 an argument that opposes it.
This
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 essay will analyse
this
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 topic from both points of view and express my opinion. On one hand, the various countries will return to their negative and many drawbacks, the main drawbacks of reducing the trust between the nations are affecting global economies.
In other words
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, the exports and cooperation between the countries will be effective
strongly
Rephrase
apply
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if they are considered as important situations as well.
On the other hand
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, there are many merits of exchanging goods and products, one of
that
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is
Correct pronoun usage
it is
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 going to increase dramatically the revenues and the benefits . It is
also
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 possible to say that the incomes, stores, markets
and
Punctuation problem
, and
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 even the
developments
Fix the agreement mistake
development
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eqiupments
Correct your spelling
equipment
for every community would peak
high
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
positively.
Moreover
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, the tourism sector is gaining more visitors or tourists, which will come back as a
profit
Punctuation problem
profit,
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 as will the whole country.
For instance
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, foreign people who need to be in your country will recommend their friends and relatives to the advanced education, public transport and facilities. In conclusion, there are no easy answers to
this
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 question. On balance,
however
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, I tend to believe that the world must treat each other and conduct campaigns for charity organisations for poor countries
such
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 as
continent
Correct article usage
the continent
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Africa
Change preposition
of Africa
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 , and help them
instead
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 of fighting each other.

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task achievement
Make sure your introduction clearly states your thesis. This helps the reader understand your main argument from the start.
coherence and cohesion
Use clear topic sentences in each paragraph to guide the reader through your ideas.
task achievement
Add more specific examples to support your points. This makes your argument stronger.
coherence and cohesion
Check grammar and spelling to improve clarity in your writing.
task achievement
You present different viewpoints clearly, which helps show balance in your discussion.
coherence and cohesion
Your conclusion summarizes your thoughts well, which is important for the overall argument.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • homogenization
  • monoculture
  • cultural diversity
  • globalization
  • innovation
  • tolerance
  • economic growth
  • consumer culture
  • interconnected
  • unique cultural identities
  • cultural richness
  • global peace
  • environmental impacts
  • accelerate
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