IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3

you work for an international company, and would like to spend six month working in its head office in another country. write a letter to you manager. in your letter explain why you want to work in the company's head office for six month say how your work could be done while you are away ask for her/his help in arranging it

Greeting's Mr.Fahad
Im
Correct your spelling
I'm
 writing you
this
Linking Words
 email to request
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
a transaction to
work
Use synonyms
 in the main office back in
america
Fix capitalization
America
show examples
 for six
month
Fix the agreement mistake
months
show examples
.
Linking Words
furthermore
Fix capitalization
Furthermore
show examples
, I do
belive
Use the right word
believe
show examples
 it will be a great chance for me to
devolobe
Correct your spelling
develop
 my
slef
Correct your spelling
self
 in IT.
However
Linking Words
, I will keep doing the same
task's
Check wording
tasks
show examples
assinged
Correct your spelling
assigned
 to
as
Correct pronoun usage
me as
show examples
 usual. I will
work
Use synonyms
duble
Correct your spelling
double
 my usual
work
Use synonyms
in addition
Linking Words
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
 not
leting
Correct your spelling
letting
 my
work
Use synonyms
 in my main office here in
ingland
Correct your spelling
England
piling
Wrong verb form
pile
show examples
 up.
Moreover
Linking Words
,
Im
Correct your spelling
I'm
 seeking your support for
approvle
Correct your spelling
approval
Linking Words
this
Change preposition
of this
show examples
assiment
Correct your spelling
assignment
.

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coherence and cohesion
Make sure to structure your letter with clear paragraphs, each focusing on a single idea.
task achievement
Check your spelling and grammar for better clarity. Avoid using contractions like 'Im'.
coherence and cohesion
Clearly state how your work will be managed while you are away in a separate paragraph.
task achievement
Use a more formal tone and phrases, such as 'I would appreciate your support' instead of 'I'm seeking your support'.
task achievement
You have a clear goal of wanting to work in the main office, which is a good start!
task achievement
It’s good that you mentioned your commitment to complete your tasks while away.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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