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Writing Samples
Band 7

The charts below show the main reasons why students chose a particular university in the UK in 1997 and 2007. Provide an overview of the information by identifying and describing the key details, and include comparisons where appropria.

The charts below show the main reasons why students chose a particular university in the UK in 1997 and 2007. Provide an overview of the information by identifying and describing the key details, and include comparisons where appropria.
The two charts illustrate the main reasons why
students
Use synonyms
 chose a particular university in the UK in the
year
Fix the agreement mistake
years
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 1997 and 2007.
Overall
Linking Words
, the most popular
reason
Use synonyms
 in both years was the quality of teaching.
However
Linking Words
, some reasons became more important over time,
while
Linking Words
 others became less important. In 1997, the quality of teaching was the main
reason
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,
Punctuation problem
apply
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 chosen by about 35% of
students
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. The second most common
reason
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 was the university’s reputation, at around 21%. Other reasons
Linking Words
such
Punctuation problem
, such
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 as location and
facilities
Punctuation problem
facilities,
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 were chosen by about 19% and 15% of
students
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, respectively. Cost was the least common
reason
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, at only 10%. In 2007, the percentage of
students
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 who chose a university because of good teaching increased slightly to about 37%. The importance of reputation
also
Linking Words
 grew to 22%.
However
Linking Words
, location and facilities became less important, dropping to 18% and 17% respectively.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, the cost became more of a factor in 2007, rising to about 6%.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "however".
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 78%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words students, reason with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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