Some researchers believe that all children need to learn a musical instrument as part of their education. Do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Discussions about learning to play musical instruments as part of education
lasts
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have lasted
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for many years. Not all
reaseachers
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researchers
believe in
this
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statement. In my
opinion
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opinion,
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all
kind
Fix the agreement mistake
kinds
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of getting new skills are
impotaint
Correct your spelling
important
for children. There are some benefits of ability to have knowledge about musical
instrument
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instruments
show examples
.
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Firstly
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Firstly,
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music
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gives
new
Correct article usage
a new
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sense of life.
For
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example
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example,
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children who like listening and playing
piano
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the piano
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from childhood
,
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apply
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are more patient and creative. Their physical and mental
is
Verb problem
abilities are
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more flexible and they often have better marks at school. By the
way
Punctuation problem
way,
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not only
piano
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apply
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can help to increase their
skiils
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skills
.
Linking Words
Secondly
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Secondly,
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some of
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this
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these
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children
,
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apply
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can become really great
music
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instrument
manifactures
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manufacturers
. Now production of
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music
Replace the word
musical
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instruments is
valuable
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a valuable
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occupation,
prices
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and prices
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for
hand-made
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handmade
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instruments are very high. So with knowledge about
music
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and
basical
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basic
skills of performing on it,
can
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you can
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create
good
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a good
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life in the future.
To sum up
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,
music
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classes and education should be in every school. Is not bad to learn to play any musical instrument. All skills are very
importaint
Correct your spelling
important
for kids.

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task response
State a clear view at once and keep this view through the essay (agree or disagree).
task response
Give two or three strong reasons with simple, specific examples to back your view.
coherence
Make each paragraph have one main idea and start with a short topic sentence.
coherence
Link ideas with small, clear words to show order and relation (for example: first, also, then, but).
grammar
Use only common words and check spelling so your meaning is clear.
grammar
Read again to fix mistakes and keep the language simple.
content
There are some good ideas that fit the topic, like the value of music in life and school.
form
The writer uses 'Firstly' and 'Secondly' to show order.
structure
The final line sums up the view, which is a good ending.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • music
  • instrument
  • learn
  • school
  • child
  • student
  • lesson
  • class
  • benefit
  • brain
  • memory
  • focus
  • discipline
  • confidence
  • creativity
  • teamwork
  • practice
  • skill
  • option
  • choice
  • optional
  • cost
  • time
  • space
  • teacher
  • group
  • play
  • sound
  • song
  • beat
  • mood
  • health
  • joy
  • culture
  • art
  • growth
  • development
  • plan
What to do next:
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