IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

The diagram below shows a possible future means of home energy production. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The diagram below shows a possible future means of home energy production. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
The given flowchart shows us the process to produce homemade
electricity
Use synonyms
 to use in the houses, avoiding
buy
Replace the word
buying
show examples
electricity
Use synonyms
to
Change preposition
from
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
companies.
Overall
Linking Words
, it is clear to see that
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 there are seven steps to produce electrical
energy
Use synonyms
,
started
Wrong verb form
starting with
show examples
 making a compost with
wasted
Replace the word
waste
show examples
 elements,
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
 produce methane
gas
Use synonyms
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
,
by
Change preposition
through
show examples
different
Correct article usage
a different
show examples
 process, the homemade electrical production
finished
Verb problem
is finished
show examples
 with the
electricity
Use synonyms
 ready to use at home.
The first step is
Linking Words
 making a compost using leaves, food, scraps and water to fill a big tank. The compost ferments and
produce
Correct subject-verb agreement
produces
show examples
 methane
gas
Use synonyms
that is
Linking Words
 transported by tubes to a storage. The
gas
Use synonyms
 is compressed by a compressor. Once the
gas
Use synonyms
 is compressed, it is
sending
Wrong verb form
sent
show examples
 to a combustion engine that
release
Correct subject-verb agreement
releases
show examples
 mechanical
energy
Use synonyms
,
Linking Words
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
 is transformed into electrical
energy
Use synonyms
 by a generator.
Finally
Linking Words
, the electrical
energy
Use synonyms
 is
storage
Replace the word
stored
show examples
 in a battery,
that
Correct word choice
which
show examples
through
Punctuation problem
, through
show examples
 a cable,
send
Correct subject-verb agreement
sends
show examples
 the
electricity
Use synonyms
that is
Linking Words
 ready to use at home.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "that is".
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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words electricity, energy, gas with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 2 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • renewable energy
  • sustainability
  • solar panels
  • energy storage
  • wind turbine
  • geothermal
  • energy efficiency
  • carbon footprint
  • grid
  • biomass
  • photovoltaic
  • smart meter
  • energy consumption
  • insulation
  • heat pump
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