IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

Caring for children is probably the most important job in any society. Because of this, all mothers and fathers should be required to take a course that prepares them to be good parents. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this view?

Some people believe that
parents
Use synonyms
 should be required to take parenting
courses
Use synonyms
 to ensure their children develop well. Personally, I fundamentally disagree with
this
Linking Words
 idea and will delve into the reasons for my perspective in
this
Linking Words
 essay. On the one hand, parenting
courses
Use synonyms
 could certainly equip new
parents
Use synonyms
 with crucial skills and insights.
For instance
Linking Words
, many first-time
parents
Use synonyms
 feel completely overwhelmed by the immense responsibility of caring for a newborn baby. Without proper guidance, they may lack the necessary expertise to handle or care for their infant effectively. These
courses
Use synonyms
 could be a valuable resource, guiding them through these common challenges.
Similarly
Linking Words
,
parents
Use synonyms
 of rebellious teenagers often struggle with communication and boundary-setting, and
courses
Use synonyms
 could teach them how to better understand and deal with these difficult situations.
However
Linking Words
, despite these potential benefits, I believe that a mandatory approach is a flawed concept. First and foremost, many people feel that parenting is an innate skill that comes to mothers and fathers naturally when they have a child. The deep connection and intuition between a parent and child often transcend textbook knowledge.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, parenting is not a one-size-fits-all approach, as what is considered good parenting can be vastly different across cultures and personal upbringings. Ultimately, forcing people to attend these classes infringes upon their personal autonomy. The ultimate decision on how to raise a child should rest with the
parents
Use synonyms
. In conclusion,
while
Linking Words
 parenting
courses
Use synonyms
 can offer helpful support, especially for those who seek it out, I believe that making them compulsory is an overreach. The innate skills of
parents
Use synonyms
, diverse cultural beliefs, and the fundamental right to personal choice are all strong reasons to oppose
such
Linking Words
 a policy.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task
Add more clear details and real examples for each idea.
structure
Keep one main idea per paragraph with a clear topic sentence.
language
Use simpler linking words to show how points fit.
structure
Conclude by restating your view with a short summary.
stance
Clear view against making parenting courses compulsory.
coherence
Some good linking words that help flow.
structure
Logical order from problem to reason to end.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Parenting skills
  • Child development
  • Mandatory courses
  • Nutrition
  • Discipline strategies
  • Effective communication
  • Government regulations
  • Voluntary workshops
  • Community support
  • Cultural backgrounds
  • Personal beliefs
  • Emotionally stable
What to do next:
Look at other essays: