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Writing Samples
Band 5

some people believe the aim of university education is to help graduates get better jobs. others believe there are much wider benefits of university education for both individual & society. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Educational institutions are where people start learning and identify a specific talent in themselves. As per
this
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 notion, some studies show that studying in universities assists graduates
to achieve
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in achieving
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 their desired employment.
However
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, other says it has positive points for both students and the community. Starting with those who think it is better to have a degree from college to get a superior job. These institutes not only help scholars to enhance their confidence level, but they
also
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 motivate them to acquire knowledge in numerous fields of education.
For example
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: in Europe 19-year-old girl passed her graduation by doing study in an eminent university in London.
Moreover
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, she acquired a scholarship to fulfil her basic necessities. Moving towards those who assert that it direct positive impact on individuals and society. A literate person can change the way of living and the ambience of the society by inventing rules and regulations he/she learnt during his/her schooling. As far as they understand the nuances to manage and organise their financial stability.
Thus
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, it helps them to get through their tough time.
For instance
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: More than a quarter of the population in India who studied in universities
,
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apply
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 manage their communities in a tidy way. In my opinion, better work-related opportunities can be obtained if we have a deep knowledge of our stream.
Due to
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 it, we can not merely manage our expenses, but we
also
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 feel independent , that we are not forcing ourselves on others to buy anything.
To sum up
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, Education is a blessing for all. To make it effective, the Government or big reputable companies should have to set a
cretiria
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criterion
while
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 hiring any employee. They must look at their original certificates to give them a job.

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improvement
Plan your essay first. Say your view in the first paragraph and keep it in mind as you write.
improvement
Use clear links to get ideas to flow. Words like also, but, however, so help.
improvement
Use simple facts or stories that fit the point. Check the facts.
improvement
Keep your sentences simple. Good grammar and short sentences are easier to read.
strength
The essay has an intro, body and conclusion.
strength
It tries to cover both views.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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