IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

Many countries believe that hosting international sporting events like Olympics or World Cup is a great idea. Others think it is a huge mistake. Give the adaavantages and disadvantages of hosting international sporting events.

Some of the nations agree
,
Punctuation problem
apply
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 that hosting international sporting events is a good thing,
whereas
Linking Words
 others consider it to be disadvantageous. I believe there are both pros and cons of organising
such
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 activities, but the former side outweighs the latter, and I will explicate my point
further
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 in
this
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 essay. First and foremost, when a
country
Use synonyms
 takes the responsibility of managing
such
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 global events,
they
Correct pronoun usage
it
show examples
bring
Correct subject-verb agreement
brings
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 in employment opportunities for the common people, because
plethora
Correct article usage
a plethora
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 of individuals are needed to make it successful.
Therefore
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,
variety
Correct article usage
a variety
show examples
 of different companies
such
Linking Words
 as cleaning agencies, food courts, hotels, etc,
gets
Correct subject-verb agreement
get
show examples
 an opportunity to make good earnings.
For example
Linking Words
, when a
country
Use synonyms
 hosts a
world level
Use the right word
world-level
show examples
competetion
Correct your spelling
competition
, more tourists are attracted towards that place, and
therefore
Linking Words
 it helps in increasing the economy.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
such
Linking Words
 occasions cause a lot of
inconvinience
Correct your spelling
inconvenience
 for the local people.
Due to
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 the ongoing preparations, the traffic on roads
increase
Correct subject-verb agreement
increases
show examples
 extensively, making it difficult for people to move from one place to another.
Also
Linking Words
, since the event
involve
Correct subject-verb agreement
involves
show examples
 so many renowned personalities coming to the
country
Use synonyms
, unnecessary police
checkings
Check wording
checks
show examples
 increase
which
Punctuation problem
, which
show examples
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
also
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cause
Correct subject-verb agreement
causes
show examples
 a lot of discomfort for
common
Correct article usage
the common
show examples
 masses.
To conclude
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, I would say that it is a good thing for a
country
Use synonyms
 to organise various
world level
Use the right word
world-level
show examples
competetions
Correct your spelling
competitions
.
Although
Linking Words
 it causes temporary problems for
normal
Correct article usage
the normal
show examples
 population,
but
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
it is increasing the economy of
Use synonyms
country
Correct article usage
the country
show examples
, and bringing in employment opportunities,
thus
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,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 opening doors for progress and development.

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language
Fix big spell and word mistakes, and make each idea clear.
structural
Raise the plan: say your view, then add two good points for and against, then a short name final
coherence
Use links like first, also, but, for example, and so to tie ideas.
content
Give one strong example to show a point, and avoid vague talk.
content
The message is clear and you say both sides.
coherence
Good links are used to join ideas in some places.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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