IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Some people believe that advertisements are useful because they provide information about products and services. Others argue that advertising encourages people to buy things they do not really need. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some consumers argue that adverts are a good way of informing the general public about new market provisions.
While
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,
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 others concur that they motivate folk towards purchasing needless things through lavish and misleading content. In my opinion, the latter is more true in the present context. On one hand, commercials are incredibly efficient at conveying details to the free market. To elaborate, adverts provide facts about the new products, about whom
,
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 the people might be unaware.
This
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 knowledge about the market keeps the citizens up to date with all the available options, so that they can choose to make an informed decision.
For example
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, Television ads for various aged care facilities help
older
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the older
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 community and their families to select a nursing home, which will suit their caring and financial needs.
On The Other hand
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, Promotions are usually misleading and are in bad faith to entrap customers to buy products they do not need. Companies create lavish ads with vague information , which makes the offers sound more financially viable
,
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 than they actually are. To exemplify, exploitive organisations or shops put 50%+50% as a promotion, which implies the product might be free or almost free of cost, but actually it is a ploy to get customers to squander money when they are already in the shop, which more often than not is the case as the people enter the mindset to buy something in the shop, and that thinking overruns logic as they are misdirected. I believe that
,
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 most promotions are meant to attract buyers towards products through misrepresented facts , which leads to unnecessary purchases, rather than educating people about new, useful launches. In conclusion, it is argued that commercials are very practical in informing markets with viable information about new merchandise
,
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however
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, some , including me, reckon, they are used to attract customers to buy stuff they do not need.

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coherence
Work on a clear plan for each paragraph. Start with your view, then say why you think this. Use simple link words like first, also, but, and then to show why and how ideas fit.
task
Keep a steady view from start to end. In the end, restate your view in a short line.
coherence
Use one clear example that fits your reason. Make sure the example is easy to see and small details that show it.
structure
The essay has a clear plan: it discusses both sides and gives a view.
content
The idea of giving an example is good.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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