Some people think that the best way to stay fit is joining a gym or health clubs. While others think That doing everyday activities such as walking or climbing stairs is enough. Discuss both aspects give Your Own opinion

It is argued that to live a healthy

life

Use synonyms

, it is important to join

Use synonyms

gym

Correct article usage

a gym

show examples

fitness

Use synonyms

groups

Use synonyms

In contrast

Linking Words

, others think that joining

groups

Use synonyms

gym

Correct article usage

a gym

show examples

is not

compulsary

Correct your spelling

compulsory

, a man can remain fit by doing daily activities like walking and climbing stairs. Well, I am of the point that joining

Use synonyms

gym

Correct article usage

a gym

show examples

groups

Use synonyms

is necessary. On one side of the argument, there are

also

Linking Words

some individuals who believe that, by doing everyday

activities

Punctuation problem

activities,

show examples

a man can remain healthy.

Although

Linking Words

Punctuation problem

apply

show examples

there are some

people

Use synonyms

in society who really

work

Use synonyms

hard in their daily routines throughout the day,

thats

Use the right word

that's

show examples

enough for them to keep healthy and fit.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, some

people

Use synonyms

are really

concious

Correct your spelling

conscious

about their health,

that

Correct pronoun usage

which

show examples

enforce

Verb problem

encourages

show examples

them to do hard

work

Use synonyms

in their

house hold

Use the right word

household

show examples

routine to remain fit.

For instance

Linking Words

, a labour or a mechanical worker has a very tough schedule throughout the day, to do just physical

work

Use synonyms

thats

Use the right word

that's

show examples

enough for them to keep healthy.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, I strongly hold

this

Linking Words

point

Punctuation problem

apply

show examples

that joining a

gym

Use synonyms

or a

fitness

Use synonyms

group is necessary to live a healthy

life

Use synonyms

. The most astonishing reason for

this

Linking Words

point is that

Punctuation problem

apply

show examples

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

society is moving towards advancement, so

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

hard

work

Use synonyms

continuously

Verb problem

is continuously

show examples

replacing

Wrong verb form

being replaced

show examples

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

machines.

As a result

Linking Words

, humans have nothing to do

hard

Change preposition

with hard

show examples

or physical

work

Use synonyms

Fix capitalization

show examples

joing

Correct your spelling

joining

Use synonyms

gym

Correct article usage

a gym

show examples

has become necessary for

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

young

people

Use synonyms

not

to just

Correct word order

just to

show examples

make them fit, but

also

Linking Words

to aware

them

Correct pronoun usage

their

show examples

the benefits of

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

health. In practical

life

Use synonyms

statisticts

Correct your spelling

statistics

provided by a

survay

Correct your spelling

survey

show that the

people

Use synonyms

who join

jum

Correct your spelling

gym

fitness

Use synonyms

groups

Use synonyms

are

more healthy

Correct word choice

healthier

show examples

than the others. In conclusion,

Linking Words

Although

Fix capitalization

although

show examples

both views exist in society, I am of the view that by joining

Use synonyms

gym

Correct article usage

a gym

show examples

and

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

and health

promot

Correct your spelling

promotion

groups

Use synonyms

you can enjoy a

more healthy

Correct word choice

healthier

show examples

and

happy

Replace the word

happier

show examples

life

Use synonyms

. In general, it is suggested to educational institutes that they should

promote

Verb problem

encourage

show examples

students to join

Use synonyms

gym

Correct article usage

the gym

show examples

and other

fitness

Use synonyms

clubs.

ieltswriting9000

Aug 24, 2025

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structure

Plan your essay. Start with a short intro that states the topic and your view. Then add 2 body parts with each clear reason and one idea to support it, and finish with a short ending.

coherence

Use simple link words to connect ideas, such as first, also, but, however, and for example.

content

Give more clear and strong examples. Explain why gym can help and why daily work can keep you fit. Use simple facts or numbers when you can.

grammar

Check spelling and grammar. Use short, simple sentences and easy words.

content

You state a clear view on the topic.

structure

There is some attempt to discuss both sides with links like 'on the one hand' and 'on the other hand'.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
6
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
39
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

320 words

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Some people think that the best way to stay fit is joining a gym or health clubs. While others think That doing everyday activities such as walking or climbing stairs is enough. Discuss both aspects give Your Own opinion

1)Some people think that parents should teach their children how to be good members of society. Others, however, believe that school is the best place to learn this. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

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