IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The charts below give information about a public library in a town called Little Chalfont. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The charts below give information about a public library in a town called Little Chalfont. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Given are three charts illustrating how the figure of
Use synonyms
library's
Check wording
library
show examples
 loans changed from 2007 to 2016,
as well as
Linking Words
 the age of
library
Use synonyms
members
Use synonyms
 and the category of loaned items in 2016.
Overall
Linking Words
,
it is clear that
Linking Words
 Little Chalfont
Library
Use synonyms
appealled
Correct your spelling
appealed
visitors
Change preposition
to visitors
show examples
 from juveniles to
adults
Use synonyms
,
while
Linking Words
 the 18-64 age bracket took the lion's share in 2016. Meanwhile, fiction both borrowed by children and
adults
Use synonyms
 accounted for the largest proportion of
seven
Correct article usage
the seven
show examples
 types of items(e.g, kids' fiction, young
adults
Use synonyms
etc.
Punctuation problem
, etc.
show examples
), with the figure of loans increasing
significantlyand
Correct your spelling
significantly and
 fluctuating occasionally throughout the period in question. Commencing with the
library
Use synonyms
members
Use synonyms
' age feature,
adults
Use synonyms
 from 18 to 64 took up over
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
half share of the total, with the elderly
accouting
Correct your spelling
accounting
 for only 12% in 2016. As for items that people chose to borrow from the
library
Use synonyms
, most of
Use synonyms
members
Correct article usage
the members
show examples
 lent children's and
adult's
Check wording
adult
show examples
fictions
Fix the agreement mistake
fiction
show examples
, which both accounted for over 70%
totally
Replace the word
total
show examples
.
On the contrary
Linking Words
, only 1% visitors showed interest in kids' DVDs, with 2%
members
Use synonyms
 choosing young
adults
Use synonyms
 and adult
audio books
Use the right word
audiobooks
show examples
 separately. With regard to the loans' number in Little Chalfont
Library
Use synonyms
, the figure had
rose
Replace the word
risen
show examples
 from nearly 15,000 to slightly over 20,000 in
first
Correct article usage
the first
show examples
 four years, with a sharp decrease to less than 20,000 from 2011 to 2013. After 2013, the number
had
Verb problem
apply
show examples
an
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
increase
Replace the word
increased
show examples
 and peaked
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
 2016.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words library, members, adults with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "give" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 3 times.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: