It has been argued that gift giving should not be encouraged, because money is often wasted on things that people do not like or want. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this?

In
this
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modernized
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modernised
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era, there are some concerns about giving
present
Fix the agreement mistake
presents
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as money is often spent on things that
people
Use synonyms
do not like or want. In my opinion, I partly disagree with
this
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statement
To begin
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with, in
this
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contemporary era
getting
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, getting
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along with
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people
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is a hard activity
to do
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,
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so
that
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apply
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giving
present
Fix the agreement mistake
presents
show examples
is used as a common way to create a relationship.
Due to
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being overused,
people
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often give
gifts
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that are not valuable to the receiver
leading
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, leading
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to money being wasted.
Consequently
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,
people
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often only have relationships that can benefit them
as a result
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of individualism
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as
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apply
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a
consequence
Replace the word
consequently
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giving
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, giving
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gift
Fix the agreement mistake
gifts
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is discouraged by some
people
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.
Besides
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,
people
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sometimes are forced to prepare presents for
people
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that they do not like
leading
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, leading
show examples
to wasting money.
On the other hand
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, it is unwise to discourage giving
gifts
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for several reasons. To be specific
giving
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, giving
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gift
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a gift
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is a way to express
feeling
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feelings
show examples
of
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between
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one to another and
also
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a common method to share in
Replace the word
Consequently
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consequence
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consequence,
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this
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can help
people
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to strengthen their bond and
also
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foster
close-knitted
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close-knit
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relationships
and
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, and
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giving
Wrong verb form
give
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givers and receivers
sense
Correct article usage
a sense
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of gratefulness. In general, giving
gifts
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is a polite
behaviors
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behaviour
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in many
culture
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cultures
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and
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, and
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in some specific
nations’
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nations,
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tradition
Correct article usage
the tradition
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giving
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of giving
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gifts
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is
also
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listed as a
must do
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must-do
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activity
as
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, as
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it can help them to show their love and help them to understand
other
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others
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better. In conclusion, it is true to claim that giving
gifts
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can have some negative impacts on
people
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financially
but
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, but
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it is not recommended to forbid or discourage
this
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activity
due to
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the benefits it
offer
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offers
show examples
.

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task
To improve task response, state a clear position and stay with it, then give stronger reasons and examples to support it.
coherence
To boost coherence, plan a clear flow: intro with your stance, 2-3 body paragraphs each with one main idea, and a short conclusion that restates the view.
coherence
Improve introduction and conclusion: mention the topic, your stance, and outline what you will cover; end with a firm closing sentence.
coherence
Support main points with specific examples or details rather than general statements; explain how gifts affect money, relationships, and culture.
language
Use simple, precise language and check sentence structure to reduce errors; vary sentence length to aid readability.
content
The essay tries to discuss both sides of the issue.
structure
conclusion
A conclusion attempts to wrap up the view.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • sentimentality
  • tradition
  • consumerism
  • personalization
  • thoughtfulness
  • reciprocity
  • intentions
  • social norms
  • emotional connection
  • materialism
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