n some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation?

Comparing
Wrong verb form
Compared
show examples
with the development of the countries‘
economic
Replace the word
economy
show examples
,estate
becoming
Verb problem
is becoming
show examples
one
Use synonyms
of the supporting
colomn
Correct your spelling
columns
in
this
Linking Words
experience.But the negative
infflunce
Correct your spelling
influence
is
the
Correct word choice
that the
show examples
prices of the estates become more and more expensive. So,owning a
home
Use synonyms
or renting
one
Use synonyms
becoming
Wrong verb form
becomes
show examples
a
seriously
Replace the word
serious
show examples
question for
people
Use synonyms
to consider,especially for the young. I have two reasons to support my opinion
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
that
owing
Use the right word
owning
show examples
a
home
Use synonyms
is better than
to rent
Wrong verb form
renting
show examples
one
Use synonyms
. On the
one
Use synonyms
hand,
Owning
Fix capitalization
owning
show examples
a
home
Use synonyms
will
takes
Wrong verb form
take
show examples
the feeling of security for
Use synonyms
people’psychology
Correct your spelling
psychological
health .
Be
Wrong verb form
It is
show examples
helpful for
people
Use synonyms
to experience high
quality
Use the right word
high-quality
show examples
living life. And
home
Use synonyms
also
Linking Words
provides a
steadly
Correct your spelling
steady
feeling to be the city’ master.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,they have more passion to earn more money to pay the monthly mortgage.
Then
Linking Words
leading
Punctuation problem
, leading
show examples
the city’s development of the economy. For another aspect,renting the
home
Use synonyms
will make
people
Use synonyms
pay more bills
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
the
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
daily life
except
Punctuation problem
, except
show examples
eating
Change preposition
for eating
show examples
and entertainment.It‘s not helpful for new
immigrating
Replace the word
immigrants
show examples
Use synonyms
people
Check wording
apply
show examples
to accumulate
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
wealth to
be
Verb problem
become
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
permanent
citizen
Fix the agreement mistake
citizens
show examples
.
Over all
Use the right word
Overall
show examples
,I support the view to earn more money to buy
an
Correct pronoun usage
my
show examples
own
home
Use synonyms
.

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structure
Your view is clear but the work has no real intro or conclusion.
content
Give 2 clear ideas with a reason and an example in separate paragraphs.
grammar
Fix many grammar problems. Use simple and correct forms.
coherence
Link ideas with simple words like 'first', 'also', 'but', 'however'.
lexical
Keep your word choice simple and consistent; 'home' or 'house' is enough.
spelling
Check spelling like 'estate' -> 'home', 'column' -> 'column' (if used).
task response
You state a view and stay on the topic.
content
You put two reasons for your view in the essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

What to do next:
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