IELTS Many students find it difficult to focus or pay attention at school nowadays. What are the reasons for this? What can be done to solve this problem?

Many pupils find concentration
at
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in
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school classes
rough
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difficult
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. The primary cause of
this
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phenomenon is the impact of technological factors, and the most viable solution is to educate
their
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apply
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young people about
this
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issue. The excessive usage of electronic
devices
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will affect
students
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' academic performance negatively.
In other words
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, the overuse of mobile phones and gaming
devices
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will cause pupils to develop a short attention span.
Moreover
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, relying on social media to receive information makes
students
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get used to receiving short and concise information
instead
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of delving into it.
As a result
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, these
students
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find it very difficult to focus at
their
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apply
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school.
For example
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, a Harvard University study has conducted an experiment on 1000
students
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. They made
half
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of them live their normal lives without using their phones for a month, and the other
half
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just lived their normal lives. After a month, the academic performance of the first
half
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has increased by 82%,
while
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the other
half
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got
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has got
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even worse. A long-term solution to
this
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predicament is to educate
their
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apply
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young people about the dangers of using their
devices
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excessively. School-age children are taught to
use
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recreational technological gadgets as little as possible.
Additionally
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, kids will probably share what they have learnt in school with their parents, and
this
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endeavour will
also
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have an impact on adults.
For example
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, Saudi Arabian schoolchildren have one of the best rates of quality and intellect among pupils because they were educated about the dangers of excessive
use
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of these technological gadgets and how to utilise them properly. In conclusion,
although
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technology plays a vital role in modern education, its excessive
use
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has clearly led to a decline in
students
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’ ability to concentrate. By raising awareness among young learners and teaching them how to regulate their
use
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of electronic
devices
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, schools and families can work together to restore focus and improve academic performance. Ultimately, addressing
this
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issue today will help create a more disciplined, attentive, and successful generation in the future.

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task
Add more real proof for your claims. Do not use numbers that look fake or unsure.
coherence
Explain cause and effect in a simple, step by step way.
coherence
Start each paragraph with a clear topic sentence and end with a short thought.
grammar
Use short, correct sentences. Check subject and verb in each sentence.
content
Limit long or odd ideas. Use two or three good examples only.
task
The topic is clear and you answer the task.
flow
The text is easy to read and you link ideas with small join words.
structure
There is a plan and a closing line at the end.
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