Improvement in health , education ,trade and science are essential for the development of poorer nations however the government or richer nations should take responsibility for helping the poor nations . Do you agree or disagree?

Improvements in health care, education, trade, and science are very important components of their countries' progress. Some individuals believe that some richer nations and governments should take responsibility for developing weaker communities. I definitely agree with
this
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statement for reasons which I will outline in the following text. Analysing the statement and explaining
further
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. The first and foremost reason is very important to provide different help from the richer countries to get grants for study or some benefits for them. Where students can learn new technologies and tactics to make better scientific progress , which can lead these areas to a bright future. They will bring their knowledge to their homes
while
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improving these areas.
For example
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, a lot of African territories are living in subhuman conditions because of the lack of education, a lot of illnesses and problems with employment. These themes should be discussed and can not be ignored by the public, as
this
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can help to improve and grow.
On the other hand
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, richer communities have the power , and only they can control it. The rich get richer, but the poor get poorer.
This
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is the main problem of the world.
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, we can see the free market , which provides the same rights to everyone and is the best option for exporting and importing. But in reality, it is not, because only the biggest economies can provide their rules and laws.
This
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makes it harder for the poor community to get the best deal, because of import dependency and vulnerability to crises In conclusion, supporting weaker nations is not only a moral obligation but
also
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a practical step towards global stability and progress. By providing fair access to education, healthcare, trade opportunities, and financial assistance, richer countries can help close the gap between developed and developing regions. Similar cooperation ensures that poorer communities have the resources to grow independently, which ultimately benefits the entire world.

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task response
Make your view clear in the first paragraph and restate it in the last paragraph. Link ideas to your main aim.
coherence
Each paragraph should stick to one main idea. Use linking words to show how ideas are connected.
lexical resource
Use simpler words and short sentences. Avoid long, mixed phrases that confuse meaning.
grammar
Fix grammar errors: subject-verb, tense, articles, and plural forms. Punctuate all sentences clearly.
enrichment
Give more examples to back up your points. Use one or two precise cases, not general talk alone.
structure
Conclude by restating your view and the key point you made in the body.
organization
Clear stance and structure with an opening and closing paragraph.
content
Some good use of examples to illustrate ideas.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • development
  • poverty
  • assistance
  • aid
  • resources
  • self-reliance
  • collaboration
  • sustainable
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