IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3

It is important for children to leran the difference between right and wrong at an early age. Punishment is necessary to help them learn this distinction. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion? What sort of punishment should parents and teachers be allowed to use to teach good behaviour to children?

There is no denying that
children
Use synonyms
 should learn the difference between right and wrong at an early age .
while
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 it is a commonly held belief that
punishment
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 is a
way
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 to help them learn . There is
also
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 an argument that opposes it . In my opinion , I consider that
punishment
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 is a good
way
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 to make
children
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 behave
will
Use the right word
well
show examples
.
To begin
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 with ,
The
Fix capitalization
the
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 right things that
child
Correct article usage
a child
show examples
 should do
is
Wrong verb form
are
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 a lot ,
Farstly
Rephrase
apply
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he or she must by
attation
Correct your spelling
attention
 to his parent
,
Punctuation problem
.
show examples
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Secondly
Add a comma
Secondly,
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 he
need
Correct subject-verb agreement
needs
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 to eat
a
Correct article usage
apply
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food
thst
Correct your spelling
that
 is rich
with
Change preposition
in
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 vitamins .
Lastly
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 , the sleeping hours
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
curcal
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crucial
 for the growth
procses
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process
. The family at home and the teachers in
shools
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schools
show examples
 must use
punishment
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agunist
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against
 any bad
behaver
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behaviour
show examples
 from
childrens
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children
.
Acording
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According
 to
recent
Correct article usage
a recent
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 study showed that 60% of
familes conseidr
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families consider
punishment
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 as
solution
Correct article usage
a solution
show examples
 for bad
behavers
Use the right word
behaviour
show examples
,
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While
Fix capitalization
while
show examples
 40%
sees
Correct subject-verb agreement
see
show examples
 it as
Correct article usage
a negaitve
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negaitve
Correct your spelling
negative
way
Use synonyms
 to teach
childrens
Correct your spelling
children
. I think
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
that
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is
Verb problem
apply
show examples
the best
way
Use synonyms
 to
punsh
Correct your spelling
punish
 a child is to take the tablets from them at least
on
Change preposition
at
show examples
bed time
Use the right word
bedtime
show examples
.
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however
Fix capitalization
However
show examples
, there
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
 no ideal
way
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 to make your son or
daghter
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daughter
 do what you ask . In conclusion, despite people having different views , I believe that
children
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 should learn
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
right and wrong at
early
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an early
show examples
 age .
However
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,
The
Fix capitalization
the
show examples
familes
Correct your spelling
families
 must avoid
valince
Correct your spelling
violence
 when they teach
children
Use synonyms
 .

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planning
Plan your essay in steps. Start with your view, then two or three main ideas, and finish with a short ending.
organization
Use one idea in each paragraph. Make a clear link to the prompt.
argument
Say why you think punishment can be good or bad, and give real reasons. Do not only state facts.
language
Keep simple spell and grammar. Use short, direct sentences.
evidence
Use examples that fit the idea. Do not talk of things not seen in the prompt.
idea
You show a clear view on the topic.
structure
There is a plan to talk about home and school.
evidence
You use numbers to show a point.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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