IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3

To day, many people use the internet and smartphones to trasnfer money to friends, family, and business. Is this a positive or negative development ?

In the present age,many
people
Use synonyms
 use the
internet
Use synonyms
an
Use the right word
and
show examples
 smartphones to
trasnfer
Correct your spelling
transfer
money
Use synonyms
 to friends,family,and business.But in the
meantime
Add a comma
meantime,
show examples
 whether
this
Linking Words
 way
to pay
Change preposition
of paying
show examples
 should be spread has sparked much debate.Some
people
Use synonyms
assent
Use the right word
assert
show examples
 that using the
internet
Use synonyms
 and
smartphonees
Correct your spelling
smartphones
 to
trasnfer
Correct your spelling
transfer
money
Use synonyms
 can protect
people
Use synonyms
 from being stolen and make
peole
Correct your spelling
people
 feel more comfortable,
while
Linking Words
 many others hold
an
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 opposite opinion.Personally,I'm in
favor
Use the right word
favour
show examples
 of the former view .Convincing
arguements
Correct your spelling
arguments
 can be made in
this
Linking Words
 essay. Understandably,certain individuals may
con tend
Use the right word
contend
show examples
 that it is more dangerous for
people
Use synonyms
 to use the
internet
Use synonyms
 and smartphones to transfer
money
Use synonyms
 to friends and others
due to
Linking Words
 the fact that
pay
Replace the word
paying
show examples
 on the phone means you give
the
Change preposition
up the
show examples
 safety
to
Change preposition
of
show examples
 the
Use synonyms
internet
Punctuation problem
internet,
show examples
where
Correct word choice
which
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have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
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 many things dangerous like
degital
Correct your spelling
digital
 scam,
tempataion
Correct your spelling
temptation
 of illegality and so on,which can steal
people
Use synonyms
's all
money
Use synonyms
just
Change preposition
in just
show examples
 a week, a day even just one minute.
However
Linking Words
,these are not sufficient reasons to neglect the advantage of
this
Linking Words
 payment. The most
envident
Correct your spelling
evident
 reason lies in the fact that it can make the
dayily
Correct your spelling
daily
 activities like
go
Wrong verb form
going
show examples
 shopping,
take
Wrong verb form
taking
show examples
 a trip even
take
Wrong verb form
taking
show examples
 a walk more convenient than going out with many
crush
Fix the agreement mistake
crushes
show examples
Punctuation problem
, which
show examples
which
Fix the agreement mistake
who
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 are so scattered that many
people
Use synonyms
 may drop some accidentally,
while
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 others are easily
be
Verb problem
apply
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stolen. All in
all
Add a comma
all,
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 in my
personally
Replace the word
personal
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 opinion,the
advantage
Fix the agreement mistake
advantages
show examples
 of
this
Linking Words
 payment is better rather than its
disadvantage
Fix the agreement mistake
disadvantages
show examples
.

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task
Answer the whole task with a clear view in the introduction and restate it in the conclusion.
structure
Plan before writing: use one idea per paragraph and link ideas with simple words like 'and', 'but', 'also'.
position
The writer shows a clear view on the topic.
topic
The topic stays on the question and includes some on-topic ideas.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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