Some think that private companies should pay for cleaning up pollution, while others say it is the government’s responsibility. Discuss and state your own opinion

There is no denying the fact that
pollution
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has dramatically increased in the
last
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century. The high demand for mining exploration,
transportaiton
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transportation
, electricity, industry, and other sectors
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
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enormously enhanced
this
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phenomenon.
While
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some people think that private
companies
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should pay for cleaning up the
pollution
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, there is
also
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an argument
states
Verb problem
apply
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that it is the government's responsibility. I believe it is the responsibility of private
companies
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and
governments
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to address
this
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issue. On the one hand, private
companies
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perform almost all the dirty work.
In other words
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, the use and exploration of fossil fuels, the operation of power plants,
industrial
Correct word choice
and industrial
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activities
,
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apply
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are all carried out by
companies
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.
In addition
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,
due to
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the substantial contribution of these
companies
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to
this
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issue, it is in their hands to clean and reduce air
pollution
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. They can address
this
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problem by using better technology or renewable energy
On the other hand
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,
governments
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have a crucial role in making decisions and applying them on the ground. It is
also
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possible to say that imposing strict regulations on businesses can be an essential step to protect the environment.
This
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approach would make
rules
Correct article usage
the rules
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clear and easy to follow
by
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for
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business owners. Another point to consider is that
governments
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have to spread awareness. Teaching individuals about the situation and what we can do is important. As
this
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would help people to understand the point of
such
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penalties, and how industries contribute greatly to
this
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problem. In conclusion, I strongly believe
governments
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and
companies
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are responsible for
such
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a problem, and they should collaborate to tackle
this
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issue. Through policies released by authorities, and
using
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by using
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renewable energy by business owners, we can reduce
pollution
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.

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task
Add more real proof or example to back each point.
coherence
Link ideas more with clear and few linking words.
structure
Say your view in the intro and restate it in the end.
focus
The essay has a clear view that both sides share the work.
organization
It uses 'on the one hand' and 'on the other hand' to show balance.
analysis
There is a closing line that says to act together.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example
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