IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

The plans below show the site of a farm in 1950 and the same site today. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Beechwood
Farm
Use synonyms
, which was established in 1950, has undergone major changes over the years. In
this
Linking Words
 article, I would like to show the difference between the
Farm
Use synonyms
 in the past and nowadays ,
according to
Linking Words
 the size of the
field
Use synonyms
 and the building facilities. Beechwood
historical
Fix capitalization
Historical
show examples
Farm
Use synonyms
 , back in 1950, we can see that it contained a large
distance
Check wording
area
show examples
 for sheep, which is quite a big space for raising animals, the barn takes huge space around there. Farmhouse was next , and
then
Linking Words
 the chicken cottage, which is behind the river. On the other side, the plant range, which only contains vegetables, soft fruit, and fruit trees, was obviously a large size that was empty and unexploited by the
field
Use synonyms
 owners. Unlike nowadays,
Use synonyms
Farm
Fix the agreement mistake
farming
show examples
 has been developed and used wisely with new technology and better strategies for dividing and exploiting the land space.
For example
Linking Words
, the large sheep range in the past was transformed into a camping
field
Use synonyms
 with more trees and tents, which is useful for the
field
Use synonyms
 visitors, and it has been associated with a modern solar panel system , which covers almost all areas around the
farm
Use synonyms
.
Moreover
Linking Words
, there are two parking lots on both sides of the
Farm
Use synonyms
 to contain all the cars for the visitors. From my perspective, the most useful addition to the estate was adding
Use synonyms
Farm
Correct article usage
a Farm
show examples
 shop, which ,
according to
Linking Words
 the visitors
,
Punctuation problem
'
show examples
 opinion
Rephrase
apply
show examples
also
Linking Words
,
apply
Verb problem
is also
show examples
 the most useful because it offers fresh foods coming directly and freshly from the
field
Use synonyms
.
Finally
Linking Words
, in 2023, a small survey was conducted in the estate town, was resulted in 88% of people being satisfied with the development that happened on the grassland, and it made more people from other villages want to come and visit the
field
Use synonyms
 or, interested in staying there.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response
Give a short start. Tell what the two times show in one line. Then group the points for old and new, with clear notes on each. Finish with a simple point on the overall view.
coherence and cohesion
Make a clear plan: intro, body with two parts, and a short conclusion. Put paragraphs for old and new, and use linking words like 'but', 'also', 'in addition', 'however'.
grammar and vocabulary
Watch for join words and wrong form. Use simple past for the old time and simple present for today.
data and examples
Give not too many small facts. Pick the main points and sizes or numbers if given, or say 'many' or 'some'.
tone
Avoid 'I' or 'my'. Use a formal tone.
content
The idea of comparing old and new farm features is clear.
content
Some examples are used, like a camping field and solar panel.
structure
There is a sense of purpose and plan in the writing.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: