IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

The table below shows the number of motor vehicles per 1,000 inhabitants in eight countries in 1990 and 2000.

The table below shows the number of motor vehicles per 1,000 inhabitants in eight countries in 1990 and 2000.
he
Use the right word
The
show examples
 table compares the quantity of
motor
Use synonyms
vehicles
Use synonyms
 per 1000 citizens in eight
countries
Use synonyms
 between 1990 and 2000. As can be seen from the table, the
figures
Use synonyms
 for
motor
Use synonyms
vehicles
Use synonyms
 examined showed an upward trend, with the
figures
Use synonyms
 for
motor
Use synonyms
vehicles
Use synonyms
 in Brazil recording the most significant growth over ten years.
In addition
Linking Words
, the
figures
Use synonyms
 in Cambodia remained stable during the same period. From 1990 to 2000 ,
motor
Use synonyms
vehicles
Use synonyms
 in Brazil sharply increased by 13525 and were ranked first out of the eight
countries
Use synonyms
,
Punctuation problem
;
show examples
 the second rank was the numbers in Romania, which increased by 7944
motor
Use synonyms
vehicles
Use synonyms
. In Jordan and Luxembourg, the
figures
Use synonyms
 for
motor
Use synonyms
vehicles
Use synonyms
 rapidly increased by 102 and 180 during the same period. In terms of the remaining
countries
Use synonyms
, the
countries
Use synonyms
 that had a slight increase were Chile and New Zealand, with 20 and 26
respectively
Punctuation problem
, respectively
show examples
.
By contrast
Linking Words
, the number of
motor
Use synonyms
vehicles
Use synonyms
 stood at one vehicle in Cambodia and was reduced from 235 to 187
vehicles
Use synonyms
 in the Bahamas
for
Change preposition
over
show examples
 10 years.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
▼
Basic structure: Add more body paragraphs.
▼
Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 67%.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words motor, vehicles, countries, figures with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "table" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 4 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 4 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 4 times.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: