The graph below gives information on the numbers of participants for different activities at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia for the period 2000to 2020

The graph below gives information on the numbers of participants for different activities at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia for the period 2000to 2020
IELTS Writing Task Chart for The graph below gives information on the numbers of participants for different activities at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia for the period 2000to 2020
The line chart illustrates how many
individuals
Use synonyms
were attendees for various programmes at one social office in Melbourne, Australia
between
Punctuation problem
, between
show examples
2000 and 2020.
Overall
Linking Words
,the total
of
Check wording
number of
show examples
individuals
Use synonyms
were involved in the
flim
Correct your spelling
film
club,martial arts,amateur dramatics,table tennis, and musical performances at
particular
Correct article usage
a particular
show examples
social centre,where the
flim
Correct your spelling
film
club
Use synonyms
figure
Fix the agreement mistake
figures
show examples
were the largest among other
platform
Fix the agreement mistake
platforms
show examples
. The
flim
Correct your spelling
film
club attendance
Use synonyms
figure
Fix the agreement mistake
figures
show examples
were the biggest at the beginning of the period,which were about 65.
Although
Linking Words
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
the enrolment total
were
Correct subject-verb agreement
was
show examples
the biggest,
but
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
at the end
Linking Words
of the chart the
figure
Use synonyms
had not significantly changed,which was approximately 68. Another one is martial arts
individuals
Use synonyms
which
Punctuation problem
, which
show examples
was the second largest total in the beginning at 35.It had fluctuated over the period and finished at 38. The amateur dramatics enrolment
were
Correct subject-verb agreement
was
show examples
around 26 in 2000.After the next 5years,it increased
about
Change preposition
by about
show examples
29.From 2005 to 2020, the count of amateur dramatics reached a loss of attendees at approximately 7
which
Punctuation problem
, which
show examples
was the lowest
figure
Use synonyms
among
other
Correct article usage
the other
show examples
five categories.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, the table tennis attendance
of
Change preposition
at
show examples
social which
were
Correct subject-verb agreement
was
show examples
around 18 in 2000.The first ten years
the
Punctuation problem
, the
show examples
total gradually increased to 20,but from 2010 to
2020
Punctuation problem
2020,
show examples
the enrolment peaked at about 57
which
Punctuation problem
, which
show examples
was the largest
changed
Replace the word
change
show examples
among others.
Finally
Linking Words
, there
was
Correct subject-verb agreement
were
show examples
no musical performances
attendees
Change preposition
for attendees
show examples
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
the first five years.After 2005, the total
of
Check wording
number of
show examples
individuals
Use synonyms
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
this
Linking Words
site gradually increased and reached
at
Change preposition
apply
show examples
18 in 2020.

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Basic structure: Use less body paragraphs.
Vocabulary: Replace the words individuals, figure with synonyms.
Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 4 times.
Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 4 times.
Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: The word "reached" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "approximately" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "gradually" was used 2 times.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • participants
  • social centre
  • comparison
  • trends
  • consistently popular
  • gained popularity
  • lost popularity
  • community interest
  • availability of facilities
  • social factors
  • economic factors
  • external events
  • economic downturns
  • health crises
  • demographic changes
  • aging population
  • marketing
  • community outreach programs
  • participation rates
  • Melbourne
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