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Writing Samples
Band 3.5

Percentage of children with different educational problems in two primary schools.

The table gives information about the proportions of
children
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had
Correct pronoun usage
who had
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 seven
problems
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 in learning in
school
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 A and
B
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 over the period of 10 years, starting
to
Change preposition
in
show examples
 2005.
Overall
Linking Words
,
it is clear that
Linking Words
while
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 the percentage of
children
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 with various educational
problems
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 in
school
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 A decreased, the opposite was true for the figures of
school
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B
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. In 2005, the proportion of
children
Use synonyms
 who had
problems
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 in education in
school
Use synonyms
 A
which
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
was much larger. The figure of
student
Fix the agreement mistake
students
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 who could not concentrate in lessons and follow instructions accounted for 40% and 42% in
school
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 A,
while
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 these
problems
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 were only 15% and 6% in
school
Use synonyms
B
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. It is followed by
comparable
Correct article usage
a comparable
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 rate of
children
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 with listening skills and verbal
expession
Correct your spelling
expression
 of ideas in
school
Use synonyms
 A, at 35% and just 11% and 14% in
school
Use synonyms
B
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, respectively.
While
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 22% to 30% of
students
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 reported issues with reading ability, handwriting, and spelling in
school
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 A, only 5-8% in
school
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B
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 did so. After ten years, the rate of
students
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 with
problems
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 had significantly decreased in
school
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 A, compared to the figure of
school
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B
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. Around 20% decreased from the previous figures of
students
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 with concentration in lessons and following instructions in
school
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 A,
while
Linking Words
 just some minor fluctuations in these issues in
school
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B
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.
Whereas
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,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 the number of
students
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 with spelling
problems
Use synonyms
 in 2005 was precisely double that in 2015

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content
Some good use of data to show changes in both schools.
structure
An attempt to compare trends over time.
language
The opening line shows a main point 'Overall, it is clear'.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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