With an advanced In technology, more and more people are able to work from home and this provides benefits to workers. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

‏In the modern era,
technology
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has developed rapidly and become an essential part of daily life. It has created opportunities for people to
work
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from home and connect with companies across the world. Some argue that
technology
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makes people lazy,
while
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others believe it improves efficiency and makes life easier. ‏In my view, the benefits outweigh the drawbacks.
For example
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, remote
work
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reduces stress, since employees can complete their tasks without commuting. Research
also
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shows that
technology
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has increased employment opportunities by allowing companies to hire globally.
For instance
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, a person in Saudi Arabia can
work
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with a company in Japan without the need to travel. ‏
To conclude
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,
technology
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not only helps people keep their jobs but
also
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opens doors to new possibilities. It improves productivity, supports global connections, and continues to transform how we live and
work
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.

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task management
State the extent of agreement clearly at the start and in the conclusion.
development
Add more supporting ideas and details for both benefits and drawbacks.
coherence
Use more linking words to show contrast and sequence.
content
Clear stance on the issue
structure
Introduction and conclusion present
content
Some good examples showing global reach of work

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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