Many countries spend large amounts of money on world sporting events such as the Olympic Games and football World Cup. Instead these monies can be spent on encouraging young children to take up sports at a young age. Do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Over the past few decades,
number
Correct article usage
the number
show examples
of states
increases
Wrong verb form
has increased
show examples
, that started to spend a lot of funds on international
champion ships
Use the right word
championships
show examples
like
Olympic
Correct article usage
the Olympic
show examples
and FIFA World Cup. Some individuals argue that these grants should be
spend
Wrong verb form
spent
show examples
on young children to join
Use synonyms
sport
Fix the agreement mistake
sports
show examples
Change preposition
at in
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in
Use the right word
an
show examples
early age.
While
Linking Words
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
personally I
Correct word order
I personally
show examples
totally disagree with
this
Linking Words
perspective. The most compelling reason for holding
this
Linking Words
point is that, by
sponsering
Correct your spelling
sponsoring
these competitions, states indirectly
promot
Correct your spelling
promote
the sports and encourage adult players to show their strengths.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, these
grants allocation
Fix the agreement mistake
grant allocations
show examples
enable adult players to join
Use synonyms
sport
Fix the agreement mistake
sports
show examples
as a profession and to have
chance
Correct article usage
a chance
show examples
to be a successful athlete.
For instance
Linking Words
, Pakistan's government
sponsered
Correct your spelling
sponsored
PCB in 1998,
that
Correct word choice
which
show examples
results
Replace the word
resulted
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in
higher
Correct article usage
a higher
show examples
number of
player
Fix the agreement mistake
players
show examples
join
Wrong verb form
joining
show examples
circket
Correct your spelling
cricket
as a profession. Indeed, one of
another
Use the right word
the other
show examples
reasons for
sporting
Verb problem
hosting
show examples
these
events
Use synonyms
is the revenue from these competitions
, by
Punctuation problem
. By
show examples
investing and hosting these international
Use synonyms
sport
Fix the agreement mistake
sports
show examples
events
Use synonyms
, governments make considerable profits
,
Punctuation problem
.
show examples
Additionally
Linking Words
, tourism is
also
Linking Words
another factor
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
that
boosts
Wrong verb form
is boosted
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by hosting these
ceramonies
Correct your spelling
ceremonies
. It
also
Linking Words
enables local
bussiness
Correct your spelling
businesses
to grow, and
give
Correct subject-verb agreement
gives
show examples
them a chance to sell their products to international customers. In practical life, Qatar hosted
FIFA
Correct article usage
the FIFA
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World Cup in 2023,
thats
Check wording
which has
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resulted
a
Change preposition
in a
show examples
significantly
Replace the word
significant
show examples
rise in
tourism
Correct article usage
the tourism
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industry.
To conclude
Linking Words
,
although
Linking Words
both views
held
Verb problem
are held
show examples
in society,
But
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
I firmly believe that
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
investing in international
Use synonyms
sport
Fix the agreement mistake
sports
show examples
events
Use synonyms
is more beneficial as compared to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
children's
Use synonyms
sport
Fix the agreement mistake
sports
show examples
. In
general
Add a comma
general,
show examples
it is recommended that states should take these investments
serious
Replace the word
seriously
show examples
and should grant more funds to these
events
Use synonyms
.

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planning
Plan your essay with a short plan before you write. State your view in the first sentence and keep it clear.
content
Give clear reasons for and against. Each point should be simple and with one small example.
cohesion
Use simple linking words to show the flow (and, but, because, also).
grammar
Check grammar and spelling. Fix wrong verb forms and plural words.
stance
Clear choice of position against the idea
evidence
Some real world examples used

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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