IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

The qualities a person needs to become truly successful in today's world cannot be learned at a university or similar academic institution. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

It is undeniable that acquiring some qualities can open many doors.
While
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 some people think that qualities cannot be learned at a university or an academic institution, there is
also
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 an argument that opposes
it
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this
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. In
this
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 essay, I will explain why I think many academic institutions are not the best place to become truly successful.
To begin
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 with, a person needs to acquire some personal qualities to achieve
success
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 in life.
For example
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, confidence, time management, ethical morals, critical thinking, learning how to learn, and learning how to work on weaknesses and strengths points, all of which are significantly valuable
skills
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 one should have;
however
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, most universities do not pay attention to
this
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 approach. Another thing that schools do not consider a great deal is professional
skills
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. To illustrate, in order to be a strong
competitive
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competitor
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 in the job market ,workers need to build strong
skills
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,
such
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 as communication
skills
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, negotiation, financial resources management, emotional
intellegence
Correct your spelling
intelligence
, and many more. All of these
skills
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 are
not
Rephrase
apply
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being taught in many academic institutions. Another point to consider for achieving
success
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 in life is applying what students learn in school. It is
also
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 possible to say that many universities prefer to focus on theoretical knowledge rather than
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on practicing
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practicing
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practising
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 what has been taught.
This
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 particular approach makes
success
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 almost impossible, as applying the curriculum is one of the most important factors to learn something,
according to
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 many
scientifc
Correct your spelling
scientific
 studies. In conclusion, without a doubt, having some traits can considerably make
success
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 more achievable in today's world. I firmly believe that academic institutions have failed to accomplish
such
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 a trend
due to
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 the reasons discussed above.

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task focus
State your clear view in the intro. Say if you agree or not, and how much.
structure
Make each paragraph have one main idea and keep order.
coherence
Use simple linking words to show how ideas follow.
grammar
Fix small grammar and spelling, such as 'intellegence' and 'competitive'
content
Give a real example or clear reason for each point.
content
Your view is that some skill can be learned in uni, not all.
structure
The essay has a clear flow with 'To begin with', 'Another thing', 'Another point'.
structure
The ending restates your view.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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