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Band 5

The pie charts below show information on the highest level of education of women in Someland in 1945 and 1995

The pie charts below show information on the highest level of education of women in Someland in 1945 and 1995
The pie charts
shows
Correct subject-verb agreement
show
show examples
 the highest level of education of
women
Use synonyms
 in
someland
Fix capitalization
Someland
show examples
 between 1945 and 1995. We can see that the
propotions
Correct your spelling
proportions
 of no schooling,third grade and
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
year
Use synonyms
 6
Punctuation problem
, respectively
show examples
respectively
Punctuation problem
respectively,
show examples
 are 35%,35% and 15% in 1945
,
Punctuation problem
;
show examples
Linking Words
however
Punctuation problem
however,
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 all of them above fallen
down
Change preposition
apply
show examples
to 0% in 1995.
By contrast
Linking Words
, the percentage of
post geadute
Correct your spelling
post-graduate
 rose from 0% to 20%.The
propotion
Correct your spelling
proportion
 of
year
Use synonyms
 12 rose from 4% in 1945 to 20% in 1995,and the
propotion
Correct your spelling
proportion
 of first degree rose from only 1% to 50%,
witch was
Verb problem
which
show examples
 accounted for the
most
Correct word choice
largest
show examples
percentage
Check wording
proportion
show examples
 of
women
Use synonyms
 in 1995.
In addition
Linking Words
, the proportion of
year
Use synonyms
 9 remained unchanged
betweed
Correct your spelling
between
 1945 and 1995. In conclusion,it is
ture
Correct your spelling
true
 that the highest level of education of
women
Use synonyms
were
Correct subject-verb agreement
was
show examples
incresed
Correct your spelling
increased
 in the
fifity
Correct your spelling
fifty
 years,especially the phenomenon of no schooling
third
Change preposition
in third
show examples
 grade and
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
year
Use synonyms
 6
were
Correct subject-verb agreement
was
show examples
 eliminated.And most
women
Use synonyms
 hold a first degree in 1995.

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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 67%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words women, year with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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