People in big cities prefer to live alone or in small family units instead of large family groups. Do you think this is a positive or negative trend

In recent years,
people
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tend to live alone or in small family units
instead
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of large family groups, especially in big cities.
This
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phenomenon has become common in many countries, and there are several reasons behind it. In
this
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essay, I will discuss both points of view and provide my own opinion. The main reasons for
this
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trend are the increase in awareness of freedom
and
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, and
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people
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care about their personal privacy.
This
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is because
people
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who live alone in an apartment or small units can arrange their plans or activities by themselves.
In other words
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, they do not need to consider or discuss with other family members. Another significant reason is that
people
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prefer to rent or buy a house near their company or in a lively and vibrant area. It is a crucial factor
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people
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that people
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might consider in a large city. It means workers do not need to waste much time commuting.
In addition
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,
people
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can enjoy participating in some activities which are held in the city, and
then
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experience convenient services.
On the other hand
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, there are some disadvantages. One problem is that
people
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might lose many opportunities to stay and accompany their family members, and
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further
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further,
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this
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might lead to a loss of family bonding. Another issue is that tenants need to pay rent to a landlord, and it is a large part of workers' salaries.
Moreover
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, it might lead to financial pressure, especially for young
people
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who are just starting their careers. In conclusion,
people
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tend to live alone or in small family units
instead
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of large family groups, because awareness of freedom and personal privacy has changed.
However
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, it still needs to consider some realistic cases. I believe it is an
overall
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positive trend.

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task
Task response is okay, but add more concrete proof for your point and give a real example.
task
Some ideas are built but you need more detail and connect them with facts.
coherence
Link words are used, but some parts do not flow well. Use simple link words to connect ideas.
grammar
Paragraph order is good, but some sentences are long. Use shorter sentences and clear form.
lexis
Some phrases sound not natural. Keep to simple, clear words.
structure
Intro and conclusion are present.
content
Two sides are shown.
coherence
Reason is easy to read.
overall
Easy to read for many readers.
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