Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar; which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. Do you agree or disagree?

Nowadays, a lot of research indicates that

sugar

Use synonyms

has a negative effect on

humans

Use synonyms

. The public starts to see

Change preposition

apply

show examples

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

foods which contain high levels of

sugar

Use synonyms

. Some

people

Use synonyms

argue that consumers should

spend

Verb problem

pay

show examples

extra

Correct article usage

an extra

show examples

fee to buy

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

products which include a large amount of

sugar

Use synonyms

. I don’t align with

this

Linking Words

point.

In addition

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

article will

analyze

Change the spelling

analyse

show examples

the viewpoint and discuss the reasons below. Some

people

Use synonyms

consider that increasing the

high

Replace the word

price of high-sugar

show examples

sugar

Use synonyms

product’s price

Check wording

products

show examples

can discourage

people

Use synonyms

from consuming too

many sugars

Fix the agreement mistake

much sugar

show examples

For example

Linking Words

, consumers who are price sensitive prefer to select the cheaper product.

Moreover

Linking Words

humans

Use synonyms

who consume too

many sugars

Fix the agreement mistake

much sugar

show examples

might get cancer more easily than others.

Therefore

Linking Words

, others think high-level

sugar

Use synonyms

consumers have to pay

much

Fix the agreement mistake

a lot of

show examples

money for supporting public insurance

Punctuation problem

apply

show examples

when they are buying the

sugar

Use synonyms

-highly foods.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, businesses may use

more healthy

Correct word choice

healthier

show examples

sugar

Use synonyms

Punctuation problem

apply

show examples

when they produce the foods or drinks.

However

Linking Words

, the above reasons seem to be

benefit

Replace the word

beneficial

show examples

to the public, but

this

Linking Words

argument still has some drawbacks which cause my opposite.

Firstly

Linking Words

sugar

Use synonyms

has a different impact on

humans

Use synonyms

who have various

genetics

Replace the word

genetic

show examples

Check wording

backgrounds.

show examples

Thus

Linking Words

, we should wait the more

Correct article usage

a clear

show examples

clear

Correct word choice

clearer

show examples

result from

sugar

Use synonyms

research

Punctuation problem

apply

show examples

before we judge the danger

Change preposition

show examples

sugar

Use synonyms

products. Consuming suitable

sugar

Use synonyms

can

simulate

Use the right word

stimulate

show examples

Correct article usage

the brian

show examples

brian

Use the right word

brain

show examples

to produce

dolphin

Check wording

dopamine

show examples

which

Punctuation problem

, which

show examples

make

Correct subject-verb agreement

makes

show examples

people

Use synonyms

feel happy and

release

Correct subject-verb agreement

releases

show examples

stress.

Last

Linking Words

but not least,

sugar

Use synonyms

is a type of

earning

Verb problem

apply

show examples

energy

for

Check wording

source for

show examples

humans

Use synonyms

. Somebody may access

sugar

Use synonyms

to get energy quickly in

some

Correct determiner usage

show examples

emergency situation. In conclusion, increasing the

high-levels

Use the right word

high-level

show examples

sugar

Use synonyms

product

Fix the agreement mistake

products

show examples

is not the best method to boost human health.

kyle.3100524

Sep 19, 2025

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response

Be clear what you think in the first sentence and again at the end.

task response

Give strong reasons that link to your view. Do not add ideas that do not relate to your point.

coherence

Put one main idea in each paragraph and start with a simple sentence that tells the idea.

coherence

Use easy linking words to show how ideas flow, like and, but, also, however.

accuracy

Check grammar and spelling; fix big errors that slow reading.

content

The writer tries to show the view and a clear shape to the text.

structure

There is some attempt to use paragraphs and links.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
33
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

259 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

health problems
manufactured food and drink products
sugary products
excessive sugar consumption
discourage
promote
healthier choices
reduce
increased taxes
fund
health education
prevention programs

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

7
band
Some people believe arts such as painting and music cannot directly improve the quality of people's lives so that government money should be spent on other things. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Overall, I agree with the statement that the government should have more budget for things like public services including hospitals, parks, transportation, and many more instead of arts in order to provide a quality life to its citizens.
7.5
band
Unemployment is a growing problem all over the world. What are the causes of this? What could be done to help tackle this issue? To what extent do you agree or disagree with the statement?
Increasing in the number of unemployment has become an issue nowadays. There are several reasons why this case would lead to the issue, such as higher qualification recruitment, and the economic crisis. However, there are certain ways to address this issue.
6
band
Using mobile phones and computers, many people are not able to communicate face-to-face.
It is often believed that many people living today lack the ability to communicate face-to-face with their growing reliance on modern technology such as mobile phones and computers. I partially agree with this view, for their increasing time in isolation regardless of the fact that electric gadgets have made them more comfortable in expressing their views.
7.5
band
Some people say that the main environmental problem of our time is the loss of particular species of plants and animals. Others say that there are more important environmental problems. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
To begin, few individuals think that the major habitat consequences of this time are the deter of specific species of flora and Fauna, but others believe that environmental complication is a more crucial part of this. There are some points related to the statement Like climate changes in these eras and urbanisation in the modern world, then I will discuss both views in detail in upcoming paragraphs
7
band
Some people say that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sports facilities. Others, however, say that this would have little effect on public health and that other measures are required. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
While some believe that adding more sports centres into public spaces would lead to a better improvement of the overall health status of people living in communities, others argue that it would not have any significant impact, and there ought to be other alternative mechanisms in place to keep people healthy. Although the increase in the number of sports facilities might result in a greater proportion of residents going for more exercise, without proper education, people would not be aware that one must be physically active to be healthy.

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar; which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. Do you agree or disagree?

Include an introduction and conclusion

Some people believe arts such as painting and music cannot directly improve the quality of people's lives so that government money should be spent on other things. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Unemployment is a growing problem all over the world. What are the causes of this? What could be done to help tackle this issue? To what extent do you agree or disagree with the statement?

Using mobile phones and computers, many people are not able to communicate face-to-face.

Some people say that the main environmental problem of our time is the loss of particular species of plants and animals. Others say that there are more important environmental problems. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Some people say that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sports facilities. Others, however, say that this would have little effect on public health and that other measures are required. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.