IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Over the last few decades, the media has promoted the image of young tin women as being ideal. What problems has this caused? What solutions can you suggest to this issue?

The two maps show how Porth
Harbour
Use synonyms
 has changed from 2000 to today.
Overall
Linking Words
, the
harbour
Use synonyms
 is now more modern and built for tourists. A hotel and a private beach have been added, and there are more places for visitors to eat and shop. In 2000, the
harbour
Use synonyms
 had a marina for private yachts, a dock for fishing boats, passenger ferries, two car parks, showers and toilets, a lifeboat station and a public beach. On the east
side
Add a comma
side,
show examples
 there was an old castle that was not used. Today, most of these things are still there, but new buildings have appeared. Cafés and shops are now next to the marina. More showers and toilets have been built near the car parks. The biggest change is that the disused castle has been replaced by a large hotel, and a private beach has been made for hotel guests. In summary, Porth
Harbour
Use synonyms
 has become a busy tourist place with more facilities.

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structure
Start with a short overall view of the map, then write two small parts: old things and new things.
coherence
Use linking words to show how ideas fit together and to move from one point to another.
content
Give a bit more detail from both times and make a clear compare, not just a list of items.
grammar
Keep simple sentences but let some vary a little in how they are built.
language
Check the spell and the names of places.
structure
Clear opening and closing lines.
content
Good number of exact changes named (hotel, private beach, cafés).
coherence
Used time words to show change (2000, today).

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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