IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

knowledge or experience. Access to clean water is a basic human right. Therefore, every home should have a water supply that is provided free of charge. Do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

It is commonly argued that clean
water
Use synonyms
 is one of the basic needs for every human
beside from
Change preposition
besides
show examples
 food,
house
Correct article usage
a house
show examples
, clothes, healthcare, and education.
Thus
Linking Words
, in
this
Linking Words
 world, not
every people
Use the right word
everyone
show examples
 can have free and proper
access
Use synonyms
into
Change preposition
to
show examples
 clean
water
Use synonyms
. Up to a point, I agree that clean
water
Use synonyms
 should be free for everyone. On the one hand, providing unlimited clean
water
Use synonyms
 for all
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
household
Fix the agreement mistake
households
show examples
 would create a serious challenge for its
logistic
Fix the agreement mistake
logistics
show examples
 and
financial
Replace the word
finances
show examples
. The government should have a firm plan on how to
get
Verb problem
gain
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
access
Use synonyms
into
Change preposition
to
show examples
water
Use synonyms
 sources, until it can be successfully distributed to every household efficiently. Not only that, the cost for
this
Linking Words
 effort
Linking Words
also
Verb problem
is also
show examples
considerable
Replace the word
considerably
show examples
 high;
for instance
Linking Words
, they need
cost
Fix the agreement mistake
costs
show examples
 for pipeline
maintenace
Correct your spelling
maintenance
, for
build
Wrong verb form
building
show examples
 the
water
Use synonyms
 pumps with huge capacity, not to forget
Linking Words
also
Rephrase
apply
show examples
the manpower cost. Personally speaking, since clean
water
Use synonyms
 still cannot
provided
Verb problem
be provided
show examples
 free of charge, there are some countries that
applied
Verb problem
have applied
show examples
subsidize
Use the right word
subsidies
show examples
 clean
water
Use synonyms
 as a form to
providing
Wrong verb form
provide
show examples
 clean
water
Use synonyms
 for their people, but not completely free.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, clean
water
Use synonyms
 is essential for every human being since it is not only for drinking, but for
hygine
Correct your spelling
hygiene
, cooking, and sanitation as well.
That is
Linking Words
 the reason why accessible clean
water
Use synonyms
 has a big support from
humanity
Replace the word
the humanitarian
show examples
 movement. Without easy
access
Use synonyms
into
Change preposition
to
show examples
 clean
water
Use synonyms
, communities are vulnerable to
get
Wrong verb form
getting
show examples
 infected by
disgestion
Correct your spelling
digestive
disease
Fix the agreement mistake
diseases
show examples
 and skin
disease
Fix the agreement mistake
diseases
show examples
;
for example
Linking Words
,
diarrhea
Change the spelling
diarrhoea
show examples
, typhoid, ringworm, or even bacterial infection,
which
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
all of
those
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
 are preventable
by
Change preposition
with
show examples
 clean
water
Use synonyms
. Particularly, in
small
Correct article usage
a small
show examples
 town in Indonesia,
diarrhea
Change the spelling
diarrhoea
show examples
 and fungal skin infection
are
Verb problem
apply
show examples
constantly
happened
Verb problem
occur
show examples
due to
Linking Words
difficult
Correct article usage
the difficult
show examples
access
Use synonyms
into
Change preposition
to
show examples
 clean
water
Use synonyms
. In
this
Linking Words
 context,
this
Linking Words
 is
undeniedable
Correct your spelling
undeniable
 that everyone has the
rights
Fix the agreement mistake
right
show examples
into
Change preposition
to
show examples
 clean
water
Use synonyms
 and the government should ensure basic needs for their people are fulfilled. To elucidate,
while
Linking Words
 unlimited
access
Use synonyms
into
Change preposition
to
show examples
 clean
water
Use synonyms
 is challenging,
however
Linking Words
, that basic needs still have to
fulfilled
Verb problem
be fulfilled
show examples
 to prevent any disease outbreaks, and it is the government's
responsibilty
Correct your spelling
responsibility
 to make sure we can have our basic human
right
Fix the agreement mistake
rights
show examples
.

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task
State your main view in the first line and keep your point simple in each paragraph.
coherence
Use clear link words to move ideas. Try 'in addition', 'however', 'for example' when you shift or add ideas.
structure
End with a clear conclusion that restates your view.
grammar
Check grammar: use the right verb form, 'the' and 's' for plural, and proper punctuation.
examples
Add a few more real and specific examples to back up your point.
vocabulary
Use only simple words and short sentences to keep a clear style.
content
The idea that water should be free is clear in the thinking.
content
The essay tries to discuss both sides and has some real life examples.
structure
There is some use of linking words to join ideas.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • basic
  • human
  • right
  • water
  • supply
  • provided
  • free
  • charge
  • agree
  • disagree
  • health
  • essential
  • sick
  • diseases
  • supports
  • education
  • children
  • focus
  • learning
  • searching
  • better
  • futures
  • reduce
  • poverty
  • families
  • save
  • money
  • spend
  • important
  • needs
  • promote
  • equality
  • chance
  • access
What to do next:
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