People should choose their course of study not on the basis of their own interests, but based on the kinds of jobs they can get. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Some individuals argue that students should decide on their major, considering the availability of the occupations , not their personal
interests
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.
However
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, I completely disagree with
this
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idea, because it may result in decreased productivity in the workplace and overincreased demand for trending jobs.
To begin
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, neglecting the necessity of one's own choice can be followed by several problems later on, one of which is a considerable decline in
their
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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productivity. To be more exact, were graduates
not
Verb problem
do not
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to
Verb problem
apply
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show interest in what they are studying, it would almost guarantee that they will not be interested in their occupation either. Despite employees having financial stability, a lack of interest prevents
Correct pronoun usage
them
show examples
from working at their full potential and may even lead them to leave their work uncompleted.
For example
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, if a child who desires to work as a constructor became a teacher at school, they would be more likely to exhaust themselves mentally faster,
due to
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their desire to rely on their physical power.
Additionally
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, there are numerous advantages to taking personal
interests
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into account when choosing a career path. First of all, it leads to
stabilisation
Correct article usage
the stabilisation
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of the need for different jobs. Having
interests
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which differ from one another, people can study different subjects.
As a result
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, they can occupy different occupations in the future
instead
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of focusing on a single or a group of trending jobs. If the vast majority of people studied IT engineering, which is the most crucial course of study in the world of technology, many of the applicants would become unemployed because of the limited availability of places for IT engineers. In conclusion, I am more convinced that it is wrong to neglect personal
interests
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when deciding on a subject to study, because it can prevent workers from becoming unproductive and stabilise the demand in a workplace.

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content
Your stance is clear. Keep this view in all your points and rest your ideas on it.
structure
Each idea needs a clear start sentence (topic sentence) and more full detail with plain facts or short, simple examples.
coherence
Link ideas with simple words like First, Also, But, So, and Then to show how they fit.
language
Check grammar and spelling in small parts. Read aloud to find mistakes.
language
Do not repeat words too much. Use common, simple words.
content
The writer states a clear view and has some good ideas.
structure
The essay has a plan with an introduction, body and conclusion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example
Topic Vocabulary:
  • course of study
  • job prospects
  • market demands
  • employment opportunities
  • financial security
  • personal fulfillment
  • innovation
  • job market
  • career advancement
  • critical thinking
  • creativity
  • adaptability
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